Out Of Work Comic Strips - Page 100

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Out Of Work

View 991 - 1000 results for out of work comic strips. Discover the best "Out Of Work" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, Dilbert, substitute teacher, tykes, children, flammable

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert sits in the chair and Dilbert sits on the hassock. Dilbert asks, "Can't I talk you out of becoming a substitute teacher?" Dogbert replies, "Don't worry." Dogbert continues, "I won't damage the little tykes." The caption says, "Day one." Dogbert stands in front of a blackboard and says, "Good morning, children. I'm Mr. Dogbert." A student asks, "Are you flammable?"

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, wasting, madonna, sun tan, lotion, applicator, barbie

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says to Dilbert, "While you were wasting your time at work I came up with a million dollar idea." Dogbert shows Dilbert a bottle with a doll on the top. Dogbert says, "It's the 'Madonna Sun Tan Lotion Applicator' for lonely guys!!" Dilbert says, "I'll take one." Dogbert says, "It looks like Barbie on a stick, but it's Madonna."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, operating, manual, buying, flowers, opening, doors, money, woman, Women, dating

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "Thanks for asking me out. Would you like to see my operating manual?" Dilbert asks, "Operating manual?" The woman explains, "It's an aid to men. It covers everything from 'buying flowers' to 'opening doors.'" Dilbert reads the manual and says, "Looks like you're due to have your jewelry rotated." The woman replies, "Every thirty days. Saves money in the long run."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, job, morning, amnesia, waking up, screaming

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits up in bed and thinks, "Ugh . . . What time is it? . . . Where am I? . . . Who am I?" Dilbert thinks, "Must be morning . . . Is this a work day? Do I have a job? . . . Is it worth getting up for?" Dilbert sits on the edge of the bed and thinks, "'Morning amnesia': nature's way of keeping you from waking up screaming."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dinosaur, Dogbert, pretending, extinct, comeback, elvis', jumpsuits

View Transcript

Transcript

Bob and Dawn the Dinosaurs confront Dogbert. Bob says, "Dogbert, we can't stand hiding around the house anymore." Bob looks out the window and says, "We dinosaurs ruled this planet once. Now we just hide in people's houses, pretending to be extinct." Bob takes Dawn's hands and says, "Dawn, it's time for our comeback tour." Dogbert says, "I think some of Elvis's jumpsuits will fit."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, dorgy, industrialist, japanese, maid, promoted, ww2

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Dorgy, why are you dressed like a maid? Dorgy: Dogbert is teaching me capitalism. Today I am lowly maid. But with hard work I will be promoted to job as major industrialist. Right? Apparently there is flaw in system. Dogbert: Yeah, but we blame it on the Japanese,

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, mutt, walk, canin, clod, dog, dummy, pooch, pinhead, bowser, blockhead, hound, hiney

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and Dogbert walk outdoors. Dilbert says, "This is so nice . . . Just a man and his mutt out for a walk." Dogbert says, "Mutt?!" Dogbert says, "I think of it more as a 'canine and a clod' or a 'dog and a dummy' . . . Maybe a 'pooch and a pinhead' or a 'bowser and a blockhead.'" Dilbert says, "I think that's enough." Dogbert adds, "A 'hound and a hiney.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dogbert, garbage, cataloupe, rinds, newspaper, sprinkled, coffee, grounds, blue collar, work, romantic

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert asks the garbage man, "Mister Garbage Man, what is life?" The garbage man replies, "Well, Dogbert . . ." The garbage man continues, "Life is like old cantaloupe rinds wrapped in a faded newspaper and sprinkled with wet coffee grounds." Dogbert asks, "Life is garbage?" The garbage man replies, "Call me a romantic."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, Dogbert, large, side, portrait, Family, voyager, waiting, door, jabba, date

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert asks Dogbert, "You're saying my blind date is a tad on the large side . . .?" Dogbert replies, "No." Dogbert continues, "I'm saying her family portrait was taken by 'Voyager II.'" Dilbert replies, "Funny." Dilbert walks out of the room saying, "I'd better not keep her waiting at the door." Dogbert says, "Do not anger 'Jabba the Date.'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Dilbert, ex boyfriends, love, disappeared, trace, strangest, thing, cheese cake, dessert, cart

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and an enormous woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert shakes as he asks, "Y-y-you m-m-mean ALL of your ex-boyfriends disappeared without a trace?" Janet replies, "Yeah. It's the strangest thing . . ." Dilbert thinks, "Good Lord, she must have eaten them!!" Back at home, Dilbert tells Dogbert, ". . . So while she was sucking the cheesecake off the dessert cart, I dove out the window." Dilbert's clothes are ripped and his head is bandaged.