Spend Time Fighting Comic Strips - Page 100

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Spend Time Fighting

View 991 - 1000 results for spend time fighting comic strips. Discover the best "Spend Time Fighting" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 21, 2013's comic on:

Tags #catch, #fall, #fall back, #frustration, #gone wrong, #learn trust, #lesson, #questioning, #test fall, #tolerate co owrkers

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: Wally, how can I learn to tolerate my co-workers? Wally: It is time for you to learn about trust, Asok. Let me show you. Turn around. This is called the "trust fall." You fall backward and trust me to catch you... go. Asok: Why didn't you catch me?!!! Wally: It wouldn't be trust if it worked every time. Asok: What kind of lesson is that? Wally: This is how I tolerate my co-workers.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 17, 2013's comic on:

Tags #annoyance, #cubicle, #in box, #neat cubicle, #document, #on chair, #desk chair

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Gaaa!!! Every time I leave my cubicle, someone puts a document on my chair! I have an in-ox! Stop leaving stuff in my chair!!! Dilbert: How do you keep your cubicle so neat? Wally: I put everything on Alice's chair.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 28, 2013's comic on:

Tags #complaining, #fear, #opinion of plan, #rip off arms, #track down family, #kill family, #india, #Advice, #giving advice

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok: I'm afraid to give Alice my opinion of her plan. Dilbert: What's the worst thing that could happen? Asok: She could rip off both of my arms and beat me to death with them. Then she could track down my family in India and kill them one by one. Is this your first time giving advice? Dilbert: I just figured out why no one ever asks for it.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 30, 2013's comic on:

Tags #ex ceo, #executives, #generous, #negotiated, #severance package, #wages, #robotic flea, #giant flea, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Our es-CEO negotiated an unusually generous severance package. We had to build a giant robotic flea to suck the assets out of the company. The weird part is that it seemed reasonable at the time.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 06, 2013's comic on:

Tags #cats & kittens, #physics, #famous physicist, #zombie

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: This is Wulf. He used to work for a famous physicist named Schrodinger. He escaped before the experiment was finished and now he's both alive and dead at the same time. Dilbert: Like a zombie? Catbert: Uh-oh. Wulf: Wow. I have half a mind to be offended by that.

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 07, 2013's comic on:

Tags #afterlife, #death & dying, #zombie, #truth about afterlife, #projecting, #curiosity

View Transcript

Transcript

Wulf: I was Schrodinger's cat back in the day. That's why I'm alive and dead at the same time. I know the truth about the afterlife because my dead half told my living half all about it. Do you want to know what happens? Wally: Stop projecting your curiosity on me.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 28, 2013's comic on:

Tags #absent mindedness, #interviews, #unemployed, #out of work, #rising a bike, #swivel, #fall, #chair

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'm concerned because you've been out of work for such a long time. Interviewee: It's like riding a bicycle. Once you learn, you always know how. Boss: Are you okay? Interviewee: Did chairs always swivel?

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 29, 2013's comic on:

Tags #ignorance (knowledge), #internet & world wide web, #binder, #cloud

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Alan has been out of the workforce for a long time. I need you to ease him back in. Coworker: Do you have a binder of the company policies? Dilbert: It's in the cloud.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 16, 2013's comic on:

Tags #work ethic, #work best, #under pressure, #deadline, #corner stone

View Transcript

Transcript

Coworker: Wally, are you almost done with your part of the project? Wally: I work best under pressure, so I wait until the deadline is almost here. Coworker: What if something more important comes up and you don't have time? Wally: That's the cornerstone of my system.

Thank you for voting.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 26, 2013's comic on:

Tags #business ethics, #managers & supervisors, #ethics course, #failed ethics, #engineer, #grasp, #fast track, #management, #corrupt, #business, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You failed the online ethics course for the third time. You can't be an engineer for this company if you have no grasp of business ethics. You leave me no choice. I'm putting you on the management fast track. Wally: Huh.