Start Business Comic Strips - Page 100

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Start Business

View 991 - 1000 results for start business comic strips. Discover the best "Start Business" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #security consultant, #meeting, #angry, #shake, #ears up, #surprise, #fillings, #dentist, #id badge, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert the Security Consultant Dogbert says, "Anyone without an I.D. badge is assumed to be an enemy combatant." Dogbert says, "Pounce on the intruder and shake him until his fillings fall out!" Alice says, "How much did we pay for that advice?" Dogbert says, "It's free. I work for the dentist across the street."

Dilbert Characters

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #stockholder, #meeting, #budget, #waste money, #panic attack, #pucker face, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Stockholder says, "Hi ho! I'm a common stockholder. I'm here to see how my investment is coming along." The Boss says, "Okay, first on the agenda, we need to blow our budget before year end so we don't get less money next year." The Boss says, "How many ten-dollar mouse pads can we get for $10,000?" Stockholder says, "I hope this is a panic attack."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #website, #revamp, #launch, #technology, #crash, #success, #failure

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "We launched our revamped website today." Dilbert says, "All of the technology we used is already obsolete and every vendor we hired is out of business." Dilbert says, "?And it just crashed." Dilbert says, "I miss the days when we had brief windows of success."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #boss, #angry, #annoyed, #motivate, #fail, #read face, #wave hand, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says, "Once again, you have failed to motivate me." Wally says, "You said we shouldn't be motivated by money, so I'm waiting for the new thing to kick in." Wally says, "I'm not good at reading faces, but I think there's something happening over in this region."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #director of purchasing, #dinosaur, #new system, #annoyed, #revenge, #oil, #gas, #extinct, #suv, #ancestors, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "Bob is the director of purchasing. He's here to describe our new procurement proces." Bob says, "Our system divides products into two categories: Things you don't want, and things you're not allowed to buy." Bob says, "It's my way of saying thanks for lubing your SUV with my dead ancestors."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #buy, #product, #quote, #angry, #die, #yell, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says, "Can you give me a quote by next week?" Coworker says, "Your demeanor tells me that you will never guy our product. You only want the quote as a point reference." Dilbert says, "Or maybe I'm giving you false hope because it's less awkward to end the meeting that way." Coworker says, "Die! Die! Die!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #old coworker, #whisper, #secret, #knowledge, #die, #evil smile, #grin, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss says, "Old Johannsen has kept his job all of these years because no one else has his critical knowledge." Johannsen says, "Pss pss pss pss psss"B<R>The Boss says, "There's the worst-case scenario right there."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work, #happy, #prince of insufficient light, #devil, #giant spoon, #meeting, #photoshop, #upset, #sweat, #grab tie, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Phil, The Prince of Insufficient Light Phil says, "You stand accused of being happy at work."<RB>Phil says, "Your penalty is to attend a meeting so horrible that none may speak its name." Photoshop your co-worker's photo onto the torso below. Dilbert says, "No... Please... anything but this."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #recalibarating, #faith in humanity, #reading opinions, #message boards

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: what are you up to? Im recalibrating my lack of faith in humanity, dilbertL will this take long? Dogbert: no, I start by reading opinions awn message boards and.... Dilbert: I can come back later. Dogbert: You ignorant juice bag

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #confusion, #fear, #firings, #humor, #meeting, #panic, #downsized, #spam folder, #recession, #intern, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "You still work here? I thought I downsized you last week." Asok says, "Um?I don't think so." The Boss says, "Check your spam folder after the meeting." Dilbert says, "First recession?"