Unfunded Man Date Comic Strips - Page 100
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Share July 14, 2006's comic on:
Dogbert the Lobbyist Dogbert: Congressman, I will give you this bag of money if you vote for tax breaks for my client. Try to be less obvious than the last time. Congressman: Yes! I vote yes! Man: Smooth.
Share July 15, 2006's comic on:
Dogbert: You're in luck. I've lobbied the governments of several countries to attack your country and liberate you and your oil. Man: We're already a democratic country! You're confusing us with North Elbonia! Dogbert: For a nitpicker, you sure dress poorly.
Share September 30, 2006's comic on:
"The new employee at work is hot, and she's getting special treatment. How can I get rid of her?" "Water finds its own level. She'll leave within a week." "They say that most people meet their future spouses at work." erk!
Share June 08, 2007's comic on:
Dilbert: "Happy birthday. What's it feel like to be 50?" "It's great! I've never felt better in my entire life!" "So it's sort of a delusional thing?" "Yes, luckily."
Share July 09, 2000's comic on:
Asok points to his diagram as he explains to the group, "My software will create human simulations from DNA samples." The Boss asks Asok, "What's the market application?" Asok answers, "Well...there are many various applications." The Boss says to Asok, "Name one." Asok begins to explain, "Well...someday the entire human genome will be mapped and decoded." Asok continues, "You could take a hair sample from a woman who refuses to date you..." Asok continues to explain, "and create a software simulation of her to keep in your computer watch." Asok says, "You could have one button to feed her and one button to punish her." Wally replies, "I'd buy it." The Boss asks Asok, "Can you add a button?"
Share March 14, 2007's comic on:
Financial Advisor Man: You've made a lot of money as a demotivational speaker. I recommend allocating 2% of it to me, and 98% to things that sound good if you don't look into them too closely. How about a managed stock fund with high churn and a big front-end load? Wally: Sounds good.
Share April 14, 2007's comic on:
You wrote last year's date on this report. Ha ha! Swift. "I enjoy pointing out your mistakes because it makes me feel better about myself." "I wrote this last year." "This will go faster if you say you didn't."