Corporate Vision Comic Strips - Page 11

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130 Results for Corporate Vision

View 101 - 110 results for corporate vision comic strips. Discover the best "Corporate Vision" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Is it difficult to transition from leading troops in combat life to the corporate life? "WHERE ARE THE PRODUCT SPECS?!!" "The main difference is that it's harder to get good intel."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"I finished all of my projects in one day." "I also reconfigured the network, wrote seven white papers and applied for nine patents." "Are you naked or am I developing X-ray vision?" "Give a thought to decaf."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"...And I work there as an engineer." "Go away. I lost $3,000 when your company restated its earnings." "Tonight I was rejected for corporate malfeasance." "I'll add it to the list."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"I had a productive time at the management retreat." "We golfed as hard as we could until we came up with a new vision for the company!!!" "But no one wrote it down, so we're going to try again next month."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #depressed, #corporate job, #intern, #unimportant tasks, #feel nothing, #stressed, #ptsd, #punch, #numb out

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Asok: My job is an endless series of mind-numbingly unimportant tasks. "My central nervous system is starting to atrophy." The Boss: "I'm kind of busy." Asok: "Punch me in the head so I can feel something."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 23, 2013's comic on:


Tags #gadgets, #tablet computer, #dime sized computer, #lick it, #attach to eyeballs, #fail, #fast fail, #finish in month

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CEO: I have a vision that our next product will be a tablet computer the size of a dime. Users will lick it and attach it to their eyeballs. Can you finish that in a month? Dilbert: I can fail at any speed you like.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 2008's comic on:


Tags #coropoaret raider, #nine dollars, #tough negotiator, #eight dollars, #hat, #elbonians

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An Elbonian says, "A corporate raider has offered to buy our company for nine dollars." Another Elbonian says, "We should ask for more." The first Elbonian says, "He's a tough negotiator." The first Elbonian says, "Now it's only eight dollars?" Dogbert says, "And I want you to do something in your hat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 13, 2010's comic on:


Tags #meeting, #suicide, #face front, #web only, #company, #business

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Dogbert says, "You're a third-rate company in a dying industry." Dogbert says, "I recommend consultant-assisted corporate suicide." The Boss says, "Will it hurt?" Dogbert says, "It might sting a little when you announce your'e going to be a web-only company."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 28, 2010's comic on:


Tags #burden to people, #dutch sandwhich, #less appealing name, #tax attorneys, #transfer tax, #taxes

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Dogbert: I can lower your corporate taxes by using a strategy that tax attorneys call "the dutch sandwich" and Im not vice making that up. So...that would transfer our tax burden to people who can't afford tax attorneys. Dogbert: yeah....their sandwich has a less appealing name.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 25, 2009's comic on:


Tags #Politics, #hearing, #argument, #economy

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Bailout hearings Man says, "Mr. Dogbert, did you fly here in a corporate jet?" Dogbert says, "Yes, the same jet that took you on a fact-finding trip to Aruba, you wool-coated glob of fat." Dogbert says, "Bring it on! I can do this all day." Man says, "I yield my time to the hypocrite from another state."