Drink Himself Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

240 Results for Drink Himself

View 101 - 110 results for drink himself comic strips. Discover the best "Drink Himself" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #photograohy, #new hobby, #picture, #selfie

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss holds a camera and says to Dilbert, "Photography is my new hobby." The Boss takes a flash photograph of himself. Dilbert says to himself, "Do you want a picture of me?" The Boss says, "No, I like to look at them later."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boring meeting, #fidgeting, #distarcted, #pens

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits between Alice and Wally at a meeting. Someone is speaking, saying, "Blah, blah." Dilbert thinks to himself, "I can't believe I get paid for this." Dilbert looks down the table at his co-workers, all looking dazed. Dilbert thinks, "This thing lasts two more hours." Dilbert thinks to himself, "Maybe I should fidget with my pen." Dilbert looks at Wally who is fidgeting with his pen. Dilbert thinks, "I'm too late. Now I'd look uncreative." Dilbert continues to think to himself, "I wonder how long I could hold my breath." Wally continues to fidget with his pen and thinks, "Fidget." Dilbert holds his breath as Wally continues to fidget with his pen. Dilbert passes out and hits the ground with a "WHUMP!" Alice looks at Dilbert's feet propped up on the table as Wally grabs for Dilbert's pen. He says, "Ooh, TWO pens. What would THAT be like?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #waiting, #stock isn't vested, #over flow, #limbo, #hell

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert thinks to himself in front of his computer terminal: "I can't do anything because I'm always waiting for someone else." Phil, the Ruler of Heck, appears and says to Dilbert: "And you can't quit because your stock isn't vested." Dilbert asks Phil: "Am I in Heck?" The latter replies: "No. I'm just working the overflow from limbo."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #limbo, #a division of heck, #career limbo section, #wait to be seated

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert is at the threshold of an entrance bearing the sign: "Limbo, a division of Heck." Phil, the Ruler of Heck, tells Dilbert: "Step inside." Inside, standing by a "Please wait to be seated" sign, Phil informs Dilbert: "You'll be sitting in the Career Limbo section. Goodbye." Arms akimbo, Dilbert thinks to himself: "Jeepers! The service here is terrible!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ceo selling stock, #portfolio, #routine diversification, #sell, #sudden panic, #employees, #boss, #ceo, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Studying company financial information at his terminal, Dilbert exclaims: "Yikes! Our CEO is selling his stock!" At the Boss's office, the Boss reassures Dilbert: "Don't worry. It's routine diversification of his portfolio." Dilbert says: "Oh...I guess that's okay." Meanwhile the Boss stares at his computer screen and furiously works the keyboard as he thinks to himself: "Sell, sell, sell."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #arm hair growth, #on phone, #wait in hall, #hair growing nicely, #wait for boss, #phone call, #asked to wait

View Transcript

Transcript

Outside the Boss's office, Carol, the Boss's secretary, tells Dilbert: "He's on the phone. You'll have to stand here and wait." She continues with her instructions to Dilbert: "Don't leave. Don't make noise. Don't try talking to me." Standing alone and waiting, Dilbert examines his arm and thinks to himself: "Arm hair LX-943 is growing nicely."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #paul tergeist, #technology, #new lab partner, #pen hovering

View Transcript

Transcript

A strange-looking man with a tie that sticks-up in the air introduces himself to Dilbert who is sitting facing his computer. The man says: "My name is Paul Tergeist." Dilbert is attentively looking at his computer which displays an error message. Paul Tergeist continues: "I have a way with technology." Dilbert's computer crashes. The Boss appears and asks Dilbert: "Have you met your new lab partner?" Dilbert does not answer him, however, as he is staring with perplexity at his pen, which is suspended in mid-air before his eyes. Dilbert exclaims: "My pen is hovering!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fake disability claim, #disabled, #hard to believe, #note from doctor, #obvious, #long time

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to Dilbert as he pours himself a cup of coffee in the break room, "I'm thinking about going out on a fake disability claim." Wally and Dilbert are walking with a cup of coffee in hand. Wally goes on to say, "Do you think anyone will believe I'm disabled?" Dilbert replies sarcastically to himself without speaking, "It's hard to believe you're not." Wally enters The Boss' office and asks, "Do you need a note from my doctor?" The Boss replies sarcastically unenthused, "No, it's been obvious for a long time."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #disablity, #jiggle the camera, #test, #walls claim, #sneak, #camera, #caught, #spy, #window, #unsuspecting

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok goes to Dilbert's house to spy on him. While video taping Dilbert's actions, Asok thinks to himself, "Wally's claim of disability will be put to the test." Now from a different view in Dilbert's yard (next to the fence), Asok thinks to himself, "Here we go...oh, yeah...come to Asok...go, baby, go!" Back at the office, Catbert asks Asok "Does he ever move?" Asok replies innocently, "It looks that way when I jiggle the camera."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tiny dried peanut, #what would dogbert do, #what would dogbert do?, #god like, #worship, #dog worship, #friends, #ask yourself

View Transcript

Transcript

Walking down the street, Ratbert thinks to himself "At all times I ask myself, what would Dogbert do?" Ratbert also thinks, "Then it doesn't matter that my brain is the size of a tiny dried peanut." Ratbert pauses on the sidewalk with arms crossed and goes on to think, "That thought would make Dogbert hungry."