Financial Problems Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

253 Results for Financial Problems

View 101 - 110 results for financial problems comic strips. Discover the best "Financial Problems" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #emotional manipulation, #executives, #financial gain, #leader, #leaders, #less unlikable, #lonely job, #manipulation, #obliviousness, #popularity

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Being a leader is a lonely job. Dilbert: Try being less of a #!@*. Then people might want to spend time with you. CEO: I don't see how that could work. Dilbert: Can we get back to manipulating my emotions for financial gain?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #managers, #managers & supervisors, #morale, #robots, #problems, #lying, #spectacular job, #award randomly, #in charge, #robot boss, #temporary, #employees, #oversight, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Did you have any problems filling in for me while I was on vacation? Robot: It was hard at first. I couldn't tell who was lying about doing a spectacular job. Boss: That's why I reward them randomly. Robot: I tried that and it did seem to settle them down.

Root Cause Is People

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Root Cause Is People - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #problems, #cause and effect, #human error

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I found the root cause of our problems. It's people. They're buggy. Boss: Did you bring a pen?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ideas, #problems, #talking, #solution, #obliviousness, #criticism, #honesty

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Why didn't you tell me our biggest vendor pulled out of the deal? Dilbert: If I told you my problems, you would suggest solutions. Your solutions generally don't make sense. But you are my boss, so I would be obliged to waste time looking into your suggestions. So if you try to solve my problem, I will have two problems instead of one. Boss: Sometimes my ideas are good! Right? Dilbert: That is a dangerous way to think.

Worthless Financial Projections

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Worthless Financial Projections - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #money, #finances, #big business, #projection, #prediction, #guessing, #estimate

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Here's the financial projection you asked me to do. It's basically just guessing plus math. Obviously, it's useless for making decisions because I can get any result I want by tweaking the assumptions. Boss: Don't say any of that stuff when you present it to the board tomorrow.

Financial Forecaster Quit

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Financial Forecaster Quit - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #big business, #money, #projection, #prediction, #Advice

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: Our financial forecaster quit. I need you to fill in for him. Dilbert: I don't know how to do financial forecasts. Boss: Neither did he. Dilbert: How were you making decisions? Boss: It's better if we don't excavate that septic tank.

Anger Issues

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Anger Issues - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #anger issues, #listen to crazy people, #mental problems, #work weekend, #crazy people

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Im worried that all of my employees might have mental problems. The Boss: They exhibited anger issues when I told them to work all weekend for no extra pay. CatBert: Did they say you're the cause off their mental problems? The Boss: I dont listen to crazy people.

Everyone Else Is Worthless

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Everyone Else Is Worthless - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #fire, #pawn, #problems, #project, #the boss, #useless, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I'm adding you to the network upgrade project. Everyone else on the team is lazy and useless, so I need you to do all of their work. Dilbert: Maybe you should fire them. The Boss: Don't try to pawn off your problems on me.

Ten Year Financial Projections

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Ten Year Financial Projections - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #business, #finances, #guilt, #office, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: How reliable are your ten-year financial projections? Dilbert: They are as reliable as all other ten-year financial predictions. Tina: Okay, good. Dilbert: Why do I feel guilty every time I talk at work?

Health Problems

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Health Problems  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #age, #complaining, #health, #office, #office workers

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Do me a favor and never put me on a project with people over the age of forty. They waste the first fifteen minutes of every meeting talking about their health problems. Boss: Did you say something? I can't hear you over my tinnitus.