Stole An Hour Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

197 Results for Stole An Hour

View 101 - 110 results for stole an hour comic strips. Discover the best "Stole An Hour" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #good news, #budgets, #calculations, #salary bidget, #vacation days, #got greedy

View Transcript

Transcript

At the staff meeting, The Boss says, "Good news on your budgets. I did some recalculating last night." The Boss says, "I found a way to give more money to every project without increasing the total budget for projects!" Wally raises his hand and says, "Question: Does your new way involve poor math skills?" Wally has a question mark above his head. Alice puts her arm in front of him and says, "Ignore the skeptic. Hey, I have a suggestion!" Alice says, "Maybe you could recalculate the salary budget for next year." Dilbert says, "And when was the last time you recalculated the vacation days?" Wally, using his calculator wrist watch, says, "I calculate that we have an hour left for this meeting, but I'm interested in YOUR caculation." Dilbert, Wally and Alice walk out of the meeting counting stacks of money. Dilbert says, "I think we got greedy when we asked if he change for a five." They whistle as they leave.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #information technolofy, #define, #materials, #enthusiasm with stupidity, #meeting, #presentation, #long, #lengthy, #boring, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

A man says, "I'd like to spend the first hour defining what "information technology" means." Asok raises his hand and says, "Ooh! Ooh! Can I help pass ou the materials?" Dilbert and Wally both look at Asok. Wally says, "It's not a good idea to mix enthusiasm with stupidty, Asok." Asok says, "Oh, sorry."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tech support, #queue, #loser, #speak to superior, #religious debate, #question

View Transcript

Transcript

A man sits in front of his computer and talks on the phone. He says, "Finally! I've been in the tech support queue for an hour!" Dogbert says, "Loser." The man says, "Can I speak to your superior?" Dogbert says, "There's some religious debate on that question."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #prospective client, #touring dept, #marketing department, #vacant cubicle, #pretending to work

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss stands in Dilbert's cubicle. The boss says, "A prospective client will be touring our marketing department in an hour." The boss says, "We need you to sit in a vacant cubicle so it looks as if work is done there." Dilbert sits in an empty cubicle pretending to type. a woman points and says, "Hey! that one is only pretending to work!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #18 hour days, #industry, #competitors die trying, #match

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says to Dilbert, "You've got to work eighteen hours a day to compete in this industry!" Dilbert cunningly says, "Let's just say we work eighteen hours a day. Maybe our competitors will die trying to match us." The Boss asks Dilbert, "Would that work?" Dilbert answers, "It almost worked for us."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #purse stolen, #navy seal training, #booby trap cubcile, #early mail delivery, #hurt mailman, #catch a thief

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice says to the Boss, "Someone stole my purse." Alice continues, "So I used my navy seal training to booby-trap my cubicle." From Alice's cubicle someone screeches. "Aaiee!!!" Alice replies, "The mail is early today."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #not nine, #start at 8am, #ten minutes early, #work start, #late, #tardy, #hour late

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally says to the Boss, "I was so motivated by your pep talk yesterday that I came to work ten minutes early!" The Boss replies, "Wally, we start at eight, not at nine." Wally responds, "That's gonna cost you ten minutes."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #good job, #meeting woman, #late, #sixty hour week, #stock options decline, #not impressed

View Transcript

Transcript

A woman asks Dilbert, "Do you have a good job?" Dilbert says, "It depends on what you mean by good." Dilbert continues, "If you consider the decline of my stock options, I work sixty hours a week for nothing." The woman says, "Hey, look at the time." Dilbert says, "My boss thinks I work eighty hours. Hee hee!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #software expenses, #marketing software expenses, #monkeys, #wear watches, #boss asks, #budget, #costs, #expenses

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss sees Alice at her desk and asks, "Why are our software expenses higher than marketing's software expenses?" Alice replies, "For the same reason monkey's don't wear watches." Caption reads: "One hour later." The Boss returns and asks, "Does it involve fur in any way?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #leave work early, #doctor appt, #female issues, #get out of work, #worked, #80 hour week, #boss, #zombie

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice is leaving the office with her briefcase and her jacket. The Boss stands with his hands on his hips in the doorway behind her and says, "It looks like someone is leaving early." Alice turns and replies, "I started at 5 a.m. and I've already worked eighty hours this week." The Boss looks at her and says, "SO?" Alice replies, "I have a doctor's appointment...for female..." as the Boss puts his hands to his ears and yells, "No details! Go Go Go!"