Asok Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

927 Results for Asok

View 101 - 110 results for Asok comic strips. Discover the best "Asok" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 15, 1999's comic on:


Tags #wax spoon, #huge spoon, #reapy, #gartitude

View Transcript

Transcript

Phil and Asok walk. Asok says, "Phil, you have atught me so muach about life. How can I repay you?" Phil says, "You can wax my huge spoon." Asok says, "Why do have a huge spoon?" Phil says, "I'm just lucky, I guess."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 1999's comic on:


Tags #process manager, #process, #poorly manged, #intern, #no process, #voted out of meeting, #annoying

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally, Dilbert, the Boss, and others are in a meeting. The Boss introduces the woman next to him to the group. The Boss says, "Patty is our new 'process manager.'" The Boss continues, "Patty doesn't know how to DO anything." He adds, "She only knows how to do things BETTER!" Patty raises a finger, "Process!" Patty says, "For example, this meeting is poorly managed because you have no process." Patty, turning to Asok, continues, "And this intern obviously had no process for deciding whether to attend." The Boss raises his hand. He addresses the group, "Okay, Patty is annoying. All in favor of getting rid of her." The entire group, except for Patty, raises their hands. Asok looks like he's going to strangle her. As they all leave the meeting behind the dejected Patty, Dilbert says to her, "You lasted longer than Timmy the 'Facilitator.'"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 28, 1999's comic on:


Tags #pick up phone, #calling and calling, #fist of death, #gnawed, #wall to escape

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice stands behind Asok who sits at his computer. Alice says, "Asok, I've been calling and calling, but you don't pick up your phone." Alice pushes up her sleeve and says, "I'd like you to meet a little something I call the "fist of death." Wally and Dilbert look at a tattered hole in a cubicle wall. Wally says, "It looks like he gnawed through the wall to escape."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 29, 1999's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #employee skills, #database, #moving everyone, #jobs, #laughed fuzzy

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption "Catbert: Evil H.R. Director" Catbert sits at a conference table with Wally and Asok. Catbert says, "I'm starting an employee skills database." Asok raises his hand and says, "Question: Is this the first step in moving everyone to jobs they don't want?" Catbert says, "No, no, no..... The first step was when I laughed myslef fuzzy thinking about it."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 05, 1999's comic on:


Tags #fat man, #huge breakfast, #lunch, #until dinner, #work all night

View Transcript

Transcript

The boss walks with Asok. The boss says, "Asok, when I was your age I'd eat a huge breakfast, so I wouldn't have to stop working for lunch." The boss says, "Then I'd eat a huge lunch, so I could work all night, or until dinner, whichever came first." The boss says, "That's how I got to be the man I am today." Asok says, "Fat?"

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 11, 1999's comic on:


Tags #objectives, #rest of year, #what happens now?, #double salary, #harm in asking

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok says, to the boss, "I've finished all my objectives for the rest of the year." Asok says, "What happens now? Do you double my salary, or do I take the rest of the year off?" Asok carries a huge pile of papers down the hall, Asok says , to Wally, "You were wrong Wally: there is harm in asking." Wally says, "ooops."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 12, 1999's comic on:


Tags #personal goal, #self actaulization, #outdated binders, #alpahbetical, #reqiuested, #feel unfulfilled, #phase two, #project, #find meaning, #ship binders, #dump

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok stands in front of the boss desk and says, "I fear I am not meeting my personal goal of self actualization." Asok says, "I put all of our outdated binders in alphabetical order as you requested, yet I feel unfulfilled." Asok says, "I assume that in phase two of this project I will find meaning." The boss says, "Now ship the binders to the dump."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 13, 1999's comic on:


Tags #old binders, #landfill, #fedex, #marketing, #look expose reports, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok stands with a box behind Wally who sits at his computer. Asok says, "Wally, what is the quickest way to send this old binders to the landfill?" Wally says, "I usually use "Fedex". Charge it to marketing; they never look at their expense reports" Asok walks away and thinks, "here's one more thing I can never tell anyone about my job."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 19, 1999's comic on:


Tags #recovered memory, #ritual abuse, #annual performance review, #memories fade, #takes 12 months

View Transcript

Transcript

WAlly, Dilbert and Asok sit at lunch. Asok says, "Aaargh! I'm having a recovered memory of ritual abuse!" Wally says, "You had your annual performance review this morning." Asok says, "Do the memories ever fade?" Dilbert says, "It takes about twelve months."

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 03, 1999's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #evil director, #training classes, #skilled, #better job, #secret untraining method, #hammer, #head, #hit on head

View Transcript

Transcript

Caption "Catbert: evil h.r. director" Catbert looks into Asok's cubicle. Catbert says, "Asok, you have taken too many training classes." Asok says, "Too many?" Catbert says, "You're too skilled now. There's a risk you'll leave for a better job." Asok stands blind folded. Catbert holds a huge hammer above his head. Asok says, "Does the "secret untraining method' work every time?" Catbert says, "I've never tried it before."