Better Please Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

741 Results for Better Please

View 101 - 110 results for better please comic strips. Discover the best "Better Please" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #transferred, #marketing, #slaps employee, #groggy, #disoriented, #fit in better, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Im sorry Dave, But your being transferred to marketing and theres no budget to train you as a marketer. Slap! Dave: where am I? I need a drink. The Boss: This is a temporary fix...but you'll fit in now.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #small group, #young, #Funny, #single people, #socialize, #romances, #ski trips

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: "Dilbert, I'm forming a small clique of all the young, funny, single people in the department." "We'll have drinks during lunch, talk about ski trips, and have romances within the group." Dilbert: "Please...just shoot me now." Tina: "No, no...we need you to do our work."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #trying to please, #fool, #better please, #crush you, #selfish dogbert, #justa thought, #others, #threatened

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "I can't live my life trying to please others." Dogbert: "I think I can speak for all others when I say, 'Fool! You'd better please us or we'll crush you!'" Dilbert: "It was just a thought." Dogbert: "We 'others' don't like to be threatened."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #forgiveness, #seek permission, #personal risk, #next reorganization, #sound stupid, #ask permission

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: "I say it's easier to ask forgiveness than to ask permission." TED : "I say it's better to seek permission, thus delaying your personal risk until it all becomes moot in the next reorganization." Wally: "That makes mine sound kinda stupid." TED: "Get over it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #reengineer, #business processes, #jump on band wagon

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I just read this great book about how to 'reengineer' our business processes. everybody's doing it. We'd better jump under the bandwagon before the train leaves the station! Im putting you in charge. The Boss: If you need any management support you know where to go,

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #rate of inflation, #Promotion, #net worth, #shopping cart, #aluminum cans, #all good carts

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: "At the current rate of inflation, with no raises or promotions..." "Our net worth at retirement will be...a shopping cart full of aluminum cans." "We'd better do something." Wally: "I'm going shopping before all the good carts are gone."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #better comoritively, #dread, #fixed income, #health problems, #pre meeting meeting, #retirement, #shrink, #wrinkles, #complaints

View Transcript

Transcript

wally: Im looking forward to retirement. I can't wait! I'll have my tiny fixed income, barley enough to survive! ...and a new health problem almost everyday! Wally: I'll have wrinkles everywhere and I'll actually shrink! HAHA! I'll produce nothing and I'll complain constantly! Dilbert: You're looking forward to a ll that?? WallyL well...compared to working here... The boss: Its time for the pre meeting meeting on employee productivity. Wally and Dilbert: mmm. fixed income ...health problems...

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #commercial prodcuts, #secret, #evoultion, #zimbu the monkey

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Zimbu the monkey designed three commercial products this week! we'd better find out his secret. wally: He's using his tail! He has a natural advantage! Wally: I feel the jaws of evolution on my throat. Dilbert: good gravy! Did you see him cut and paste?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #about co workers, #donuts, #get prompted, #say bad things, #weight, #woman, #medical

View Transcript

Transcript

DOGBERT: If you want to get promoted , say bad things about co workers so you look better by comparison. Dilbert: Geez, Lisa, It looks like you've been hotting the donuts pretty hard lately. Dilbert: heh-hehe...big things are coming my way soon.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad luck, #lottery tickets, #fabulous wealth, #delight, #hedonistic, #yesterdays date, #old, #expired, #scam, #scammer, #cheater, #rat, #dog, #animals

View Transcript

Transcript

"Value priced lottery tickets" Ratbert: "I am drawn by the allure of fabulous wealth and a life of hedonistic delight...one please." "This is dated yesterday." Dogbert: "Ooh, bad luck. Try again?"