Combined Company Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

872 Results for Combined Company

View 101 - 110 results for combined company comic strips. Discover the best "Combined Company" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #head of market research, #120k salary, #value opinions, #refrence, #honesty, #pay these days

View Transcript

Transcript

"I got a job as the head of market research at your company. I'll be pulling down $120 K per year." "I don't value otehr people's opinions so I'll just use my own." "Just for reference, how much does honesty pay these days?" "Shut up."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #broke code, #can't be measured, #cut pay, #depend on meeting, #own darn fault, #sales targets

View Transcript

Transcript

"From now on, twenty percent of your pay will depend on the company meeting its sales targets." "In effect, we'll cut your pay and tell you it's your own darn fault." "Will the sales target be based on a complex formula and involve numbers that can't be accurately measured?" "You broke the code!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #boos, #delegate work, #mark compalins, #throws a fit, #complain, #behind back, #boss retreats

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: We've hired the Dogbert Ad Agency to give our company a new image. Mark: AAAGH! MARK: Sure, Sure...I"ll do it, but I'll have this expression the whole time. and just maybe I"ll complain behind your back!! The Boss: Never mind, I'll do it myself. Oh, right, keep the good assignment,

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ad agency, #dogberts, #new slogan, #essence, #captures, #we abuse employees, #pass savings, #squalid cubicles, #wear that shirt

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert's Ad Agency Dogbert: Ive developed a new slogan that captures the essence of those company. "we abuse our employess and pass the savings to you" We'll film actual employees in their squalid cubicles. The boss: Wear that shirt

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #commercial, #show company cars, #avoid pedestrians, #message, #we care, #sell bloopers, #dick clark

View Transcript

Transcript

"Dogbert's Ad Agency" "The commercial will show company cars braking hard to avoid pedestrians." "The message is, 'we care about people we don't even know!'" "Was it dangerous to film this?" "We'll sell the bloopers to Dick Clark." "Thud"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #tough year, #special team, #much smaller team

View Transcript

Transcript

"This will be a tough year for the company." "It will take a special kind of team to get by." "Go team!" "Team! Team!" "Yes!" "Specifically, it will take a much smaller team."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #management fast tracker, #deliver big report, #ceo, #fax, #shredder, #tricked, #punked, #contempt

View Transcript

Transcript

"Hey, Matt. How's our favorite management fast-tracker?" "Great! I've got two minutes to deliver my big report to our CEO. Can you tell me where the fax is?" "Oops, I'm wrong. That's the shredder." "He'll go far in this company." "Bzzzzp."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #fired, #hired back, #other people are smarter, #wally is dumb, #boss is dumb, #more money

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Wally? I thought you got fired. Wally: I did. But people outside the company appear smarter, so they hired me back as a consultant for way more money. wally: Did you understand that? Don't feel embarrassed to ask for help on the hard stuff.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #consulting comany, #executive compensation, #ninety percent, #overpaid, #repeat business

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: the dogcart consulting company has reviewed the executive compensation plan as you requested. My conclusion is that you're already hideously overpaid, Im recommending ninety percent pay cuts and a whack in th head for each of you. I"ll bet you don't get much repeat business. Dogbert: Oh yeah, as if Id want to spend more time with you.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #confidential, #ethics offcie, #weasel boy, #ethics expert

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: "The company hired an ethics expert to help us through the gray areas." "Your calls to the ethics office are completely confidential." Dogbert: "Thanks for sharing that. I own you now, Weasel-boy."