Few More Apllcants Comic Strips - Page 11

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share January 06, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #the boss, #Wally, #rewriting, #wiseguy, #shocks

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Dilbert arrives at home wearing a headband with an antenna on it. Dilbert tells Dogbert, "The Boss is making us wear these things on our heads so he can give us painful shocks whenever he wants." Dilbert says, "I'm rewriting mine so it redirects the signal to Wally." Dogbert says, "I'm sure he'll see the humor in that." The Boss presses a button on his belt and says to Dilbert, "Okay, wiseguy, do you want more of this?!" Dilbert replies, "Maybe one more." In the background, Wally receives several electric shocks.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 05, 1993's comic on:


Tags #cars, #clean, #letters, #express, #outrage, #editor, #Funny, #pages, #sarcasm, #children, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #time

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The caption says, "Their cars are always clean." A man polishes his car with a cloth. The caption says, "They write letters to express their outrage." A man sits at a table with an open newspaper next to him. The man writes, "Dear Editor, The funny pages is no place for sarcasm! Think about the CHILDREN!" The caption says, "They read the same book more than once." Dilbert sits in his chair reading a book and laughing. Dogbert says, "They are the people with way too much time on their hands."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 28, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #break, #restroom, #mingle, #dryer, #delay, #impenitrable, #agenda, #alone, #Dogbert, #work

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Dilbert sits in a meeting. The speaker says, "Let's take a ten-minute break." Dilbert thinks, "Uh-oh." Dilbert thinks, "I've got to use the restroom and get back before all the mingle groups have solidified." Dilbert stands in the bathroom and thinks, "Uh no, it's an air dryer, an unexpected delay!" Dilbert returns to the room and thinks, "I'm too late. All the minglers have formed impenetrable groups." Dilbert thinks, "I'll pretend to study the agenda so it looks like I have a reason to be alone." Dilbert thinks, "Everybody knows it doesn't take this long to read an agenda. Now what do I do??" Beads of sweat fly off Dilbert's forehead and he tugs on his tie. He thinks, "I've got to stand here alone, totally non-mingled, for five more minutes." Dilbert arrives at home looking disheveled. Dogbert asks, "Tough day at work?" Dilbert replies, "Just the breaks."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 02, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #alice, #the boss, #Wally, #raises, #dependent, #evaluation, #co-workers, #hypothetically, #small, #available, #budget, #standards

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The Boss says to Dilbert, Wally and Alice, "From now on, your raises will be partly dependent on an evaluation by your co-workers." Wally asks, "Hypothetically, if my co-workers got small raises then wouldn't there be more available in the budget for me?" Wally, Alice and Dilbert fall to the ground and fight. The Boss says, "That didn't last long, even by our standards."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 06, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #photographers, #embarassing, #pictures, #celebrities, #photos, #situation, #crawford, #reupulsed

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Dilbert sits in his chair reading "I Spy" and Dogbert sits on the hassock reading a book. Dilbert says, "I don't understand why photographers try so hard to get embarrassing pictures of celebrities." Dilbert continues, "Heck, I could just scan the celebrity photos into my computer and create any embarrassing situation you can think of." Dilbert and Dogbert sit at the computer. Dogbert says, "I think Cindy Crawford should look more repulsed." Dilbert replies, "This is before we kiss."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 1993's comic on:


Tags #the boss, #Dilbert, #engineering, #knowledge, #promote, #prima donna, #demonstrate, #personality, #dissorders, #mumble, #disdain, #humanity

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Dilbert sits across from the Boss's desk. The Boss says, "Your engineering knowledge is good, but I can't promote you to 'prima donna.'" The Boss continues, ". . . Unless you demonstrate a few more serious personality disorders." Dilbert replies, "I can mumble." The Boss says, "Sure, but can you do it with disdain for all of humanity?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 11, 1993's comic on:


Tags #alice, #artificial, #band, #creatures, #Dogbert, #dominant, #dominants, #engineers, #envelopes, #females, #gray, #groom, #mist, #native, #note, #the boss, #vegetation

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Dogbert's journal entry says, "A small band of the creatures were known to live high in an artificial structure." The panel shows an office building. Dogbert's journal says, "On my way to study them I took note of the native vegetation." Dogbert stands in an office wearing a backpack. He feels a potted plant and thinks, "Rented." His journal says, "The younger males were at play. They became self-conscious when watched." Dogbert watches a man playing computer games. Dogbert's journal says, "The dominant male had a gray back. He controlled the others by waving little envelopes." The Boss waves paychecks at the employees and they bow to him. Dogbert's journal says, "There were few females in the group. The less dominant males had no chance of mating." Dilbert and Wally watch a woman walk past them. Dogbert's journal syas, "Unlike other species they head no instinct for grooming." A man asks, "Want to groom?" Wally replies, "Drop dead." The journal says, "My time was up, but I will miss them, those . . ." Dogbert walks toward the elevator. The journal concludes, "Engineers in the mist." Wally asks Dilbert, "How long are you supposed to microwave popcorn?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 15, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #testosterone, #level, #tailgate, #problem, #trying

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Wally shows Dilbert a pickup truck and says, "Maybe it's because of my high testosterone levels, but I couldn't resist getting my pickup jacked up." Wally says, "I thought it would be more frightening to the people I tailgate." As he jumps into the truck and wiggles his legs, Wally says, "The only problem is that you can't let people see you trying to get in it."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 17, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #complain, #vote, #logical, #bumper

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert sits on Dilbert's legs. Dilbert says, ". . . And people who don't bother to vote have no right to complain." Dogbert asks, "Why not?" Dilbert replies, "Why not? It's obvious. No vote means no right to complain. You can't get much more logical than that." Dilbert says, "Besides, that's how I was raised." Dogbert asks, "You were raised by bumper stickers?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 19, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #school, #Kids, #career, #engineer, #plum, #assignment, #role model, #giggle, #children, #future

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Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "The local school wants somebody to talk to the kids about a career as an engineer." The Boss giggles as he says, "I'm giving this plum assignment to you because you're such a good role model." Dilbert says, "It's more sincere sounding when you don't giggle." The Boss says, "Remember, children are our future!"