High Demand Comic Strips - Page 11

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217 Results for High Demand

View 101 - 110 results for high demand comic strips. Discover the best "High Demand" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #portotype, #wireless hassock - buddy, #gps naviagtion, #stalk owners, #stalk, #powerpoint presentations

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Dilbert: I finished the prototype for the wireless hassock-buddy. It uses GPS navigation to stalk its owner and demand that he rest his feet. Today I learned the words "stalk" and "AAAGH" In my powerpoint presentations.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pantless prima donna, #smithsonian, #framed, #the louvre

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Pantless prima donna I demand an assistant to document my miracles. That which I touch will be tagged for the smith Usonian, That which I create will be framed for the louver. Asok: really? and exciting assignment? what is it?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #demand raise, #doest care, #promises, #over promised, #free work, #suberb negiator

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Asok: I demand a raise or else I will quit today. the Boss: Goodbye. Asok: Noooo!!! please let me stay! I'll work every weekend for free!!! The boss: Okay. Dilbert: were you correct that your superior intelligence makes you a superb negotiator? Asok: Please shut up.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #no straight answer, #asap, #when, #done, #soon, #slack, #how much slack?, #questions

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Dilbert: do you have market demand numbers? Ted: Im in the middle of something. can I get back yo you later? Dilbert: How much later? Ted: when do you need it? Dilbert: As soon as possible. Ted: I'll do it as soon as Im done. Dilbert: when will that be? Ted: as soon as possible. Dilbert: when will it be possible? Ted: cut name some slack. Dilbert: how much slack do you need?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accounting, #expense figures, #base ten, #counting system, #full range, #odds and even, #hp printer ink, #finance troll

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"Accounting" "Can you explain these expense figures?" "It's a base ten accounting system with a full range of odd and even digits." "This isn't helping." "Tastes like hp printer ink... high gloss paper, four hours old."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #invent nanotech stem cells, #point to hand, #almost done, #prnak, #give high five, #crush them, #blame

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Dilbert: "My boss wants me to invent nano-technology stem cells because it sounds good." DOgbert: "Try pointing to your empty hand and saying, 'you can't see them but they're almost done!'" "Then trick him into giving you a high-five and yell, 'you crushed them! Aaag!!!'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #warning lables, #on donuts, #high calorie donuts, #will kill you, #tastes great, #choked to death

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The Boss: The government says we have to put warning labels on our forty thousand calorie, shard -filled doughnuts prodcut. Dogbert: How about: warning! this product will kill you but thats okay because it tastes great! Police: It looks like he chocked on some sort of warning label.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #company relocating, #high crime, #tax reasons, #ceo says, #limo, #parking garage, #chain bike to whino, #advice from ceo

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The Boss: "Our company will be relocating to a high-crime area for tax reasons." "Our CEO says don't worry about your safety because your limo can pull right into the underground parking garage." "Then he added, "Or chain your bicycle to a wino. Whatever."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dont worry, #high crime area, #experts assure you, #gange members, #exhautsed, #beat up

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CAtbert: Don't worry that the company is moving to a high-crime area. "My experts assure me that you'll have a 90% chance of survival every time you walk outside." "That estimate depends on the assumption that the gang members become exhausted from beating you up."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #high crime area, #fiduciary, #misconducting, #cfo, #kicked, #beat up

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Alice: "I hate walking to work in this high-crime area." "Take this, you fiduciary misconducting *#@!%" "That was our C.E.O."<Br>"I know."