Success Comic Strips - Page 11
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170 Results for Success
View 101 - 110 results for success comic strips. Discover the best "Success" comics from Dilbert.com.
Wednesday March 11,
2015
How To Make Money While Adding No Value
Tags ceos, mentor, mentors, mentoring, protege, success, merit, qualification, luck money, wages, earning, earn, money, salary
Transcript
CEO Mentors Wally. CEO: How would you like me to mentor you, underling? Wally: Can you teach me how to make $25 million per year while adding no value to the company? CEO: I don't know how to teach you that. Wally: Was it all luck or did you have to kill people?
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday March 14,
2015
Wally Is Not Hungry To Succeed
Tags mentor, mentoring, protege, wages, executives, ceos, compensation, work ethic, success, money
Transcript
CEO: I've been mentoring you for a week. Do you feel different? Wally: Yes. Spending time with you makes me feel underpaid. CEO: And that makes you hungry to succeed? Wally: I don't even see how those things are connected.
Wednesday March 18,
2015
Wall The Company Taint
Tags Promotion, manager, taint, success
Transcript
Wally: You're looking at the new vice president of zombie projects. The projects that will neither succeed nor be canceled are transferred to me so the other VP's avoid their taint. Alice: I guess that makes you the company's taint. Wally: I wear that label proudly.
Wednesday March 25,
2015
Wally Does Economic Babble Talk
Saturday April 11,
2015
Embellishing Resumes
Tags resume, lying, deception, accomplishments, management, success
Transcript
Catbert: I discovered that one of your employees embellished on his resume. Boss: That's outrageous! Fire him for lying to me! Catbert: I'm talking about the version he updated today. It says he accomplished things while working for you. Boss: That doesn't sound right.
Thursday April 30,
2015
Try Leaning In
Thursday May 07,
2015
Rewarding Wally's Failures
Tags failure, excuse, laziness, justification, reasoning, excuses
Transcript
Wally: You should be celebrating my failures instead of punishing me for them. Failure is the raw material of success. If I am not failing, it means I am not pushing myself hard enough. Boss: Fine. What have you failed at? Wally: I failed to work on my project this month.
Friday May 08,
2015
Celebrate Failure
Tags success, failure, credit, taking credit, reasoning, managers
Transcript
Boss: Failure is the raw material of success. From now on, I will celebrate your failures. Dilbert: Will you still be taking credit for our successes? Boss: That part stays the same. I'm only trying to increase the contrast to your failures.
Saturday June 13,
2015
Health Sensor Predictes Death
Tags invention, success, technology, health monitor, fitbit, smart watch, heart, heart rate, death, medical
Transcript
Ted: The health sensors you built into our smart watch prototype aren't working. According to your stupid sensors, my heart is going to stop beating in... Dilbert: Yay me!
Monday June 22,
2015
Not That Invested In Your Success
Tags work ethic, laziness, communication, excuse, excuses
Transcript
Wally: I made no progress on your project because I was waiting to ask you some questions. Coworker: You could have emailed me. Or texted me. Or stopped by my desk. Wally: I"m not that invested in your success.


