Boss Comic Strips - Page 11

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1000 Results for Boss

View 101 - 110 results for Boss comic strips. Discover the best "Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.

Welcome Baskets

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Welcome Baskets - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 30, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #racism, #new employee

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alice, the boss and ask at table. the boss: i need a volunteer to assemble welcome baskets for our new hires. alice: i recommend ask the intern because obviously, it would be sexist to ask a women to do it. the boss: good point. ask, the project is yours. ted thinking: racist.

Wally Needs A Raise

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Wally Needs A Raise - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 28, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #system, #architect, #Promotion, #pay raise

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wally: our new system installation is a catastrophe. wally: we need to tear it out and re-architect it from scratch. wally: i'm the only person qualified to lead that effort. wally: but given the enormity of the job, i won't do it without a raise or promotion. the boss: weren't you the cause of the catastrophe? wally: exactly: that's why i'm the only person who knows how to fix it. the boss: are you blackmailing me? wally: no, it's nothing like that. the boss: wouldn't i be rewarding you for failure? wally: let's not label it.

Experts And Non Experts

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Experts And Non Experts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 27, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #experts, #architecture

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dilbert: the experts say our architecture is not scalable. the boss: bah! the experts are biased. i want to hear what the non-experts say. dilbert: they say we should listen to the experts. the boss: okay, how about the people who are neither experts not non-experts?

Objective Reality

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Objective Reality - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 26, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #mit, #deliverables

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the boss: wally, can you explain why your deliverables are late? wally: an experiment at kit suggests there is no objective reality, so maybe i wasn't late. the boss: i don't know how to respond to that. wally: try smiling and nodding. maybe toss in an "oh."

New Feature Added

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New Feature Added - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 25, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #marketing, #office, #office workers, #time travel

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the boss: i need you to add a feature to our product because our marketing campaign says we already have it. dilbert: no problem. what's the feature? the boss: time travel. the boss: how long will it take to add that feature? dilbert: if i'm successful, i'll have it done by last week.

Be More Like Alice

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Be More Like Alice - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 24, 2019's comic on:


Tags #complain, #office, #office workers, #pay raise

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the boss: i can't give you a raise because you didn't do anything noteworthy this year. dilbert: it only seems that way because i'm so good at my job that i make it look easy and never complain. alice visually upset and yelling: my job is a nightmare!!! the boss: why can't you be more like alice?

Think Of You As Family

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Think Of You As Family - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 22, 2019's comic on:


Tags #office, #office workers, #business, #fired, #boarding school

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team meeting in conference room. the boss: i think of all of you as family. dilbert: you fired ted yesterday. the boss: i also sent my son to boarding school. what's your point?

Complaints About Wally

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Complaints About Wally - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 19, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #complaint, #office, #office workers, #productivity

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the boss: wally, i received 43 complaints that you have been clipping your toenails in the office. the boss: you have single-handedly destroyed all productivity on the floor. wally: in my defense, it takes two hands if you count the one holding the toe.

Using Git

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Using Git - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 18, 2019's comic on:


Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #code, #developer

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the boss: i'm hearing that none of your code has been implemented. why are you so unproductive? dilbert: your new lead developer doesn't know how to use git and he keeps overwriting my patches. the boss: i don't know what any of that means. dilbert: well, thank you for stopping by.

Potluck Celebration

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Potluck Celebration - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #potluck, #friday, #team, #celebration

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the boss in meeting: i scheduled a potluck to celebrate the team's success. dilbert: a potluck is more like a penalty than a celebration. dilbert: but i guess it's better than working. the boss: it starts at 8 pm on friday.