Drink Coffee Comic Strips - Page 11

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398 Results for Drink Coffee

View 101 - 110 results for drink coffee comic strips. Discover the best "Drink Coffee" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee & tea, double coffee, success, work ethic, passion, necessary

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Wally: I'm double-mugging because I heard that passion is necessary for success. By 4pm I'll be so passionate I'll be dating my chair. Catbert: Nothing about that sounded right.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags how-to, best selliners, leadership, sociopathic tendencies, personality disorders, read books, coffee, metting, office

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Dilbert: As you requested, I researched all of the best-selling books on the topic of leadership. Apparently, leadership is the product of sociopathic tendencies plus luck. All other personality traits are inactive ingredients. Wally: Did you actually read all of those books? Dilbert: I only needed to know they were all different.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags anger, etiquette & ethics, biggest customer, random drug sample, awkward

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Boss: Wally, I'd like you to meet the CEO of the company that is our biggest customer. Wally: I'd shake but I have coffee in one hand, my random drug test sample in the other, and I don't want either one to get cold. Hey, I'm not the one who made this awkward.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags being replced, robot, hack into, disgruntled robot, objective unclear, fax machine, paranoid

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Wally: Im being replaced by a robot that drinks coffee and looks at inappropruye websites all day. Dilbert: Lets hack into it and make it disgruntled. Robot: My objectives are unclear and I think the fax machine is plotting against me.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags do nothing robot, lazy, replacement, robot, similar to man, uncomplicated, websites, coffee drinker

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The Boss: I bought a robot to replace you. All it does is drink coffee and look at inappropriate websites. The boss: Did I forget anything? Wally: No, I not a complicated man.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags boss, coffee, good managing, horing, ignorance (knowledge), insulting, managers & supervisors, smart people, confontation, business

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Boss: Today I learned that the secret of good managing is hiring people who are smarter than I am. Maybe I'll try that next time.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee, coffee & tea, energy source, laziness, organic devices, plant seeds

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Wally: This week I tested a source of energy that can power organic devices. It's made from plant seeds and water. Boss: Is the energy source called coffee? Wally: Let's talk about Dilbert's project. I hear it's a mess.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags coffee & tea, exhaustion / tiredness, sploosh

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Coworker: I'm so tired today. Wally: Sorry. I get excited when people have problems that I know how to solve.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags meetings, work ethic, execution, innovation, full time job, excellence, inspired, died on inside, coffee and resentment, chemical formula for hatred, drilled employees

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Boss: Execution is a game of inches! You miss 100% of the shots you don't take! Innovation is everyone's full-time job! Be the dog, not the tail! Excellence is the only market that isn't crowded! Why don't any of you look inspired by my leadership? Wally: I died on the inside years ago. Now I'm just a fleshy container full of coffee and resentment. This guy was born without a soul. The she-devil at the end is the chemical formula for hatred. Catbert: Did you get through to them? Boss: I drilled until I hit bile.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags managers & supervisors, multitasking, ignorant bafoon, coffee, authority, business

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Carol: I can't finish everything today. Boss: Try multitasking. Carol: Multitasking? Is that like being an ignorant baboon and drinking coffee at the same time? Boss: I missed what you said because I was drinking coffee.