Just An Observation Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

1000 Results for Just An Observation

View 101 - 110 results for just an observation comic strips. Discover the best "Just An Observation" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 01, 2017's comic on:


Tags #micromanaging, #managers, #productivity, #google

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I have a meeting in a few minutes, so I only have time to do some micromanaging. Dilbert: Wouldn't it be better do do regular managing? Boss: I don't have time for the regular kind. Dilbert: Then wouldn't it be better to do no managing at all? Boss: Some is better than none. Dilbert: Except when less is more. Boss: This got too complicated. How about I just stand behind you and suggest you Google stuff? Dilbert: Fine. I wish I had some data for this. Boss: Try Googling it.rnet,

Tina The Whistleblower

Thank you for voting.
Tina The Whistleblower - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 22, 2017's comic on:


Tags #company policy, #human resources, #whistleblower, #security, #confidential, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Is there any kind of whistleblower protection at this company? Boss: Yes, management is protected against whistleblowers like you. Tina: Are you going to fire me? Boss: No, no, no. I'll just make you want to quit.

Tina Should Hope For The Best

Thank you for voting.
Tina Should Hope For The Best - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 20, 2017's comic on:


Tags #complaints, #human resources, #results, #transparency, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Have you done anything to address my complaints about management? Catbert: I can't tell you about any confidential conversations I have with management. Tina: So... should I just hope for the best? Catbert: That sounds like a solid plan.

Randy Meets Robot

Thank you for voting.
Randy Meets Robot - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 15, 2017's comic on:


Tags #soul, #robot, #a.i., #artificial intelligence, #morals, #etiquette

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: Robot, I'd like you to meet Randy. He has no soul, just like you. Robot: What's the etiquette for this situation? Do we high-five, then kill the soul-bag where he stands? Dilbert: I can hear you. Randy: He makes a good point. It would be better to surprise him.

Emptiness And Pain

Thank you for voting.
Emptiness And Pain - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 14, 2017's comic on:


Tags #pain, #emptiness, #soul, #work ethic, #motivation

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: This is Randy, our new employee who has no soul. Tina: Wow. What's it like to have no soul? Randy: I feel only emptiness and pain. Tina: I hope you didn't take this job to get away from emptiness and pain. Randy: No, I just wanted to get paid for it.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 03, 2017's comic on:


Tags #customer service, #loyalty program, #survey, #frustration

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Would you like to sign up for our customer loyalty program? Dilbert: Why would I do that? Man: If you don't we'll overcharge you on your purchases. But if you sign up, we will add a new level of complexity to your life that will make you hate us. Dilbert: I'll stick with the customer disloyalty program. Just overcharge me and I'll never come back. Man: You can get ten percent off your purchase today if you fill out an online customer survey and enter our store code. Dilbert: Please just overcharge me and let me leave! Man: I almost hesitate to ask which extended warranty option you want.

Ceo Makes More Money In Stocks

Thank you for voting.
Ceo Makes More Money In Stocks - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 28, 2017's comic on:


Tags #rich people, #money, #stock market, #investments, #out of touch, #obliviousness, #stratification

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: Hey, our stock is up two percent. I just made more money than you'll earn in your entire life. Remind me, do I leave you a tip?

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 27, 2017's comic on:


Tags #laziness, #work ethic, #excuses, #motivation, #projects

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I need you to add a feature to the software. Wally: That would be outside the scope of the project. Boss: Yes, but I'm your boss and I'm telling you to do it. Wally: You also told me to only do the things that are documented on the project specs. Boss: Okay, just change the documentation and then do it. Wally: If I do that, the project will be late and over budget. Boss: How many excuses do you have for not doing work? Wally: I'm just getting started. This feature will never work with the others.

Ideal Customer

Thank you for voting.
Ideal Customer - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 17, 2017's comic on:


Tags #market research, #sham, #yes-man, #demographics

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: My research shows that your ideal customer is a male Olympic athlete between the ages of 120 and 145. And just to be safe, you want that guy to not have a Yelp account. Boss: How many people are in that group? Dogbert: None, but my research will help you double that.

Thank you for voting.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 06, 2017's comic on:


Tags #greed, #scavenging, #cannibal, #furniture, #energy, #vibes, #health

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: My chair is broken. I need a new one. Boss: You can take Ted's chair. I fired him this morning. Alice: That feels icky. Boss: It's just a chair. Alice: Ted was a creepy underperformer. I don't want his loser energy on me. Boss: That's your only option unless I fire someone else today. Alice: Okay, give me an hour to do some back-stabbing and rumor-mongering. Boss: I'll just let that situation work itself out. Alice: Nice chair. Dilbert: Why did my fight-or-flight instinct just kick in?