Kill Plants Comic Strips - Page 11

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View 101 - 110 results for kill plants comic strips. Discover the best "Kill Plants" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 28, 2006's comic on:


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I've been trying for six months to solve this engineering problem. It might be impossible. "Just turn it sideways and it will fit perfectly." "Okay...Now I have to kill you."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"Before you energize my team with your proposal, let me introduce everyone." "This is Wally. He'll show no reaction because he hopes apathy will kill our idea before it creates work." "This is Alice. She'll leave halfway through your presentation to take a phone call." "This is Asok. He'll be enthusiastic because he doesn't understand how the real world works." "This is Dilbert. He'll tell you why your idea is impossible." "This is Carol. She'll spend the entire meeting wondering if that's your real hair." "And this is Ted. He gave his two-weeks' notice last week." "And I like to keep my eyes closed the entire time because of my allergies. Go."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Exit Interview "And what is your reason for leaving?" "To be honest, I was spending way too much time thinking about creative ways to kill you." "Have you cleared out your desk?" "Why don't you go check."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Google Headquarters "Isn't it a little bit evil to kill Dilbert with our death ray?" "Good point...What if I just blast the space station out of orbit and make it land on his house?" "I'll bet you ten billion dollars you can't." "And the lower has to introduce himself as 'the dumb one.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"And then we'll send the draft for review..." BZZZZZT! "Greetings. I am Wally from the year 2040." "In the future, time travel will be possible but highly unethical." "But it's only unethical if you make the mistake of changing anything from the past." "I was out of coffee so I came here to get a fresh cup. Ah, here we go." "I have to run. Make sure nothing changes because of my visit or it will kill everyone in the future." "Let me be the first to say that this feels awkward."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 05, 2006's comic on:


Tags #concerns about work, #teds work, #team building exercise, #test here, #sent asok

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"I listened to your concerns about Ted's work, so I tricked him into being left in the middle of the desert." "He thinks it's a team-building exercise. Hee hee!" "We wanted you to transfer him, not kill him." "Really? This is awkward." "And this is Ted. Where's Asok?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 13, 2006's comic on:


Tags #expressing opnion, #thousand expressions, #the wood chipper

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"Erk! That look says you want to kill me for expressing my opinion!" "No, no." "Women have a thousand expressions that say they want you to die. That one says she wants you to die of natural causes, preferably soon." Budda budda budda "She calls this one 'The Wood Chipper.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 25, 2005's comic on:


Tags #cubicle cockroach, #working hardly, #kill it, #flame thrower

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"Good morning, Alice!" "Uh-oh, a cubicle cockroach." "Are you working hard or hardly working? Ha ha!" "I must find a way to kill it." "Do you have a flame thrower?" "I can't complain; no one would listen!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 21, 2005's comic on:


Tags #dinasaur, #body gurad, #carrot stick, #nap time, #dumb dino, #momentary

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"Bob, my boss might be planning to kill me. Would you be my bodyguard?" "I can't because I'm all busy eating a carrot stick." "How about after you finish it?" "You mean nap time? Be serious!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 20, 2005's comic on:


Tags #boss, #malfeasance, #abandoned warehouse, #beneficiary, #life insurance

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I'm afraid that my boss will try to kill me because I know about his malfeasance. "I recommend that you ask to meet him alone at an abandoned warehouse." "It was a mistake to name you the beneficiary on my life insurance policy." "Remember to insult his goons."