Name Of Country Comic Strips - Page 11

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360 Results for Name Of Country

View 101 - 110 results for name of country comic strips. Discover the best "Name Of Country" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work, #desk, #problems, #distractions, #arms out, #mouth open, #yell, #fantasy

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The Boss says, "Are you running into any problems?" Alice says, "Only the kind that you make worse." The Boss says, "Name one problem that I make worse!" Alice says, "I have too many distractions." The Boss says, "Do you have any problems that aren't like that one?" Alice says, "Only in my fantasies."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #consult, #customer data, #money, #privacy, #real name, #wag tail

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Dogbert Consults Dogbert says, "Your customer data is worth a fortune." Dogbert says, "I'll find you some buyers if you give me 25%." CEO says, "What about privacy?" Dogbert says, "That's not a problem. I never use my real name."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #new boyfriend, #coworker, #angry, #jack, #clench fist, #engineer, #social, #engineering

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Alice says, "Dilbert, meet my new boyfriend, angry Jack." Alice says, "People say my high level of engineering skill comes at the cost of good social judgment." Dilbert says, "Alice, his name is Angry Jack." Alice says, "I think he wants to hold my hand now."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #patent application, #surprise, #upset, #angry, #yell, #negative space, #credit

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The Boss says, "I added my name to your patent application." Dilbert says, "What?" The Boss says, "I could have stopped you from working on it, but I didn't. I'm like an artist who understands negative space." The Boss says, "Do you know what negative space is, Dilbert?" Dilbert says, "I'm living in it!!!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #empire consultant, #crown, #king, #employees, #undproductive, #ineffecient, #brow, #windshield, #business

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Dogbert the empire consultant Dogbert says, "Make your employees less productive. That way your CEO will let you hire more of them." Dogbert sys, "Inefficiency is the same thing as leadership. A king needs an entire country just to wipe his?" The Boss says, "Brow?" Dogbert says, "I was going to say windshield." The Boss says, "Brow is catchier."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Advice, #death ray, #invention, #evil, #coffee maker, #disservice, #success, #garbage man

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Dilbert says, "My company wants to turn my invention into a death ray. How can I stop them from succeeding?" Garbage man says, "There is one natural force that can stop any form of success. It goes by the name?" Dilbert says, "Wally?" Wally says, "How may I be of disservice?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #save money, #retire, #name, #swear, #curse, #point

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Wally says, "I finally saved enough money to retire anytime I want." Wally says, "Someone should invent a witty name for that amount of money." The Boss says, "$%@# *@U" Wally says, "Perfect! Can I use that?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #unholy alliance, #plan, #meeting room, #love, #cheese, #happy, #relationships

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Wally says, "I propose an unholy alliance." Carol says, "You have my attention." Wally says, "Reserve every meeting room under my name for the year. That way you won't need to do any scheduling, and I won't need to attend any meetings." Wally says, "Don't panic; that strange feeling is you falling in love with me." Carol says, "It feels like I'm eating cheese!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #wolfgang, #legend, #spread rumor, #scacred, #hand up, #shake, #beard, #name, #plead, #bow, #software genius

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The Boss says, "I asked Wolfgang to join us." The Boss says, "He's a software genius, if not a legend." The Boss says, "He knows more than all of you put together." The Boss says, "Plus his name is Wolfgang." The Boss says, "Some say his talent is a genetic mutation. Others say that god speaks to him in Unix." The Boss says, "All we know for sure is that he glows, and he never needs to eat." The Boss says, "I feel a chill. It means he's appraoching." The Boss says, "Please don't reprogram my DNA and make me a monkey-man!!!" Wally says, "People make a lot of assumptions when you change your name to Wolfgang and stop shaving."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #heaven, #hell, #helvin, #died, #angels, #demons, #union, #outsource, #scared, #harp, #unsure, #halo

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The Boss says, "I think I died. Am I in heaven or hell?" Raj says, "You're in Helvin. My name is Raj." Raj says, "Heaven and hell have been outsourcing souls to us since the demons and angels unionized." The Boss says, "So? is this place good or bad?" Raj says, "Well, you get a harp, but you won't like how we give it to you."