Project Staus Update Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

706 Results for Project Staus Update

View 101 - 110 results for project staus update comic strips. Discover the best "Project Staus Update" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally's Dental Excuse

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally's Dental Excuse - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #excuses, #laziness, #work ethic

View Transcript

Transcript

Tina: Wally, I need your input on my project plan. Wally: One moment, please. I have to check my spreadsheet to see which excuses I already used with you. Tina: I'll need a good one to get past my anger. Wally: Hmmm... maybe something dental.

Wally Waits For Information

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Wally Waits For Information - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #procrastination, #laziness, #work ethic, #deception

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally: Should I start working on my project now or wait until I have more information. Boss: When you put it that way, I guess you should wait. Dilbert: Isn't there always "more" information to be had? Wally: Don't ruin this for me.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #help, #group project, #dependability, #failure, #psychic, #prediction

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I need your feedback on my PowerPoint deck before Tuesday. Man: I'll do that on Monday night. Dilbert: Gaaa!!! It's a trap! You are notoriously undependable. The odds of you working on a Monday night are terrible. If I don't get your input on time, you will make a fool out of me in the meeting. I'll stay up all night Monday hoping to get your email. But that input will never come. I'll end up doing the presentation on no sleep. Then you will embarrass me during the presentation by pointing out the errors in my slides. Man: For a mind reader, you sure have a terrible life.

Dilbert Might Be Colluding

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Might Be Colluding  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #collusion, #trump, #russia, #rumor, #conjecture

View Transcript

Transcript

CEO: People tell me Dilbert's project is in chaos. Why is that? Boss: Maybe he's been colluding with our Elbonian competitors. But that's just a guess. CEO: I can't unhear that.

Dilbert's Project Is In Chaos

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert's Project Is In Chaos  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #accusation, #hearsay, #conjecture, #gullible

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I hear Dilbert's project is in total chaos. Boss: That has to be true because I heard it from three other people. Man: And that's why I told three other people.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work ethic, #laziness, #group project

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I'd like to thank each member of the product team for the successful launch. Dilbert wrote the software. Alice designed the hardware. And Wally... um... Wally: Attended most of the meetings. Boss: That's all you did? Wally: I also played devil's advocate. Dilbert: You didn't say a word during our meetings for seven months. Wally: That's because you were doing everything right. Boss: Did you really do nothing for seven months? Wally: This is one of those "less is more" situations.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #failure, #power, #interns, #roadblock

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: You'll need to get buy-in from the other departments. Asok: You have given me an impossible task. I am only an intern. No one will agree to anything I ask because I have no power to hurt them. Most department heads won't even schedule a meeting with me. And if they do, they will end up canceling it at the last minute and rescheduling. There is literally no way for me to succeed at this task. Boss: I also need you to ask them to fund your project out of their budgets.

Dilbert Tries To Get Funding

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Tries To Get Funding - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #budget, #money, #spending, #projects, #upgrades, #technology, #software, #engineering

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: Who are you? Dilbert: I'm an engineer on an unfunded project. I'm attending random meetings to see if I can shake loose some spare budget money. Man: We'll be talking about the mandatory software upgrade. Dilbert: Sounds like a huge waste of money.

Scavenging For Parts

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Scavenging For Parts - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #friendship, #strategy, #parts, #scavenging, #money, #usury, #budget, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: My boss forgot to fund my project so I've been scavenging for parts. Robot: You usually don't make conversation with me. I guess this means we're friends now. People.

Dilbert Is Under Budget

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dilbert Is Under Budget - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #project, #budget, #money, #stealing, #embezzlement, #consequences

View Transcript

Transcript

Ted: You charged expenses to my project code. Dilbert: I had to because I don't have a budget. Ted: This will make it seem as if I went over budget while you didn't spend a penny. Dilbert: Good point. Wally: How's your project coming along with no budget? Dilbert: Better than I'd hoped.