Sales Comic Strips - Page 11
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197 Results for Sales
View 101 - 110 results for sales comic strips. Discover the best "Sales" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday January 12,
2007
Tags engineer, magic vendors fault, network, shoebox, twigs and leaves, engineering
Transcript
Client: Your network product appears to be a shoe box full of twigs and leaves. Sales engineer: Hoho! Just wist util my engineer does his magic and integrates it with your network! Make it look like another vendor's fault.
Thursday January 11,
2007
Tags sales engineer, making sale, install, few extra features, massage table, sprawl, get naked
Transcript
Sales Engineer Sales engineer: I did the hard part of making the sale. All you have to do is install it. I might have promised them a few extra features. Did you bring your own massage table or should I just get naked and sprawl on a desk?
Wednesday January 10,
2007
Tags cold learning, cruelest, don't wear a coat, first lesson, good liar, sales support engineer, seeking advice, how to lie
Transcript
Dilbert: I'm a sales support engineer now. Can you teach me to be a good liar? Dogbert: Sure. Meet me on the porch, and don't wear a coat; the cold will help the learning. The first lesson is always the cruelest."
Tuesday January 09,
2007
Tags heals itself, sales engineer, sales rep, totally true, truth vs.lies, questions
Transcript
Sales Engineer "Your sales rep told us that the product heals itself. Is that true?" Dilbert: It's totally true...that he said that. sales engineer: Let me ask this another way... Dilbert: NOOO!!! One way per question!"
Monday January 08,
2007
Tags Advice, avoid facts, cubicle, paid commissions, sales engineer, truth, sales rep
Transcript
The Boss: I'm making you a sales engineer. You'll be paid on commission." "When our sales reps lie, it will be your job to make it look like the truth." "Try to avoid facts."
Thursday December 21,
2006
Wednesday December 20,
2006
Tags death & dying, insurance, luck, sales, life insurance
Transcript
Bob, the unluckiest insurance agent. Bob: You're making a good decision. Man: Gaaak!
Saturday November 04,
2006
Sunday October 01,
2006
Transcript
"According to my benchmark tests, our product is the worst one on the market." "Maybe you can tweak the numbers." "Fake them?" "Fake is such an ugly word." "Just remember that your next raise depends on the sales of that product." "And mistakes happen. A decimal place can be either here or there." "All I'm asking is that you do the tests again...while drinking." "I always wondered what job satisfaction felt like."
Thursday September 14,
2006
Transcript
Our sales guy vastly underbid a job. Now it's my project to install the system in a way that's profitable. "Blame your customer for underspecifying the features then charge her through the nose for change orders." "Three million dollars for an electrical plug?" "The base model uses a potato battery."


