Wally Dream Comic Strips - Page 11
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1000 Results for Wally Dream
View 101 - 110 results for wally dream comic strips. Discover the best "Wally Dream" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday July 06,
2019
Wally Uses Speakerphonetif
Tags #cell phone, #office, #office workers, #speaker phone, #voice-texting, #click
Transcript
the boss: i asked you to stop using your speaker-phone because it was disturbing your co-workers. the boss: now they tell me you started doing voice-texting, which is even worse. wally: okay fine. later that day. alice visually upset and yelling: turn off your keyboard click sound! wally's cell phone: click click click.
Wednesday July 03,
2019
Measuring Excellence
Tags #business, #office, #excellence
Transcript
dilbert, the boss and wally at conference room table. the boss: we opened our first "center of excellence" today. the boss: at the risk of sounding too optimistic, we should be brimming with excellence by nightfall. dilbert: how will we know if is working? the boss: it's better if we don't try too hard to measure it.
Monday July 01,
2019
When Wally Is Busy
Tags #business, #office, #office workers, #busy, #witnesses
Transcript
tina: are you busy? wally: yes. tina: when should i check back? wally: when i'm not busy. tina: when are you not busy? wally: whenever there are no witnesses.
Saturday June 29,
2019
Drooling Incompetents
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #office, #office workers, #competent, #incompetent
Transcript
wally at team meeting. wally: i've been asked to lead this project toward failure so my boss can convince our ceo to cancel it. wally: i'd like all of the competent people on the team to step aside, while the drooling incompetents who remain drive it into a ditch. office worker: how can we know who among us are the competent ones? wally: well, for starters, they don't ask that question.
Friday June 28,
2019
Zombie Projects
Tags #business, #office, #zombie, #sloth, #fail, #salary
Transcript
the boss: wally, i'm putting you in charge of all the zombie projects that refuse to die. the boss: i'm counting on your sloth and incompetence to finish them off, so management feels comfortable finally canceling them. the boss: as of today, i'm paying you to fail. wally: actually, this is just the first time you're aware of it.
Saturday June 08,
2019
Ted And The Tangle Of Cords
Tags #business, #coffee, #desk, #office, #office workers, #cables, #stapler
Transcript
the boss, dibert and wally standing with coffee. the boss: has anyone seen ted lately? wally: last time i saw him he was trapped in a tangle of cables behind his desk, screaming for help. the boss: then you helped him get free? wally: i only needed his stapler.
Thursday May 30,
2019
If You Can Dream
Wednesday May 29,
2019
Never Stop Dreaming
Tags #business, #sleeping, #inspirational quotes, #Dilbert, #boss
Transcript
the boss: i printed out some inspirational slogans to motivate you. the boss: the first one is "never stop dreaming." wally: zzzz-zzzz.
Tuesday May 28,
2019
Wally And His Priorities
Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers, #sarcasm
Transcript
the boss: wally, can you attend a meeting at 10 am tomorrow? wally: sure. here's a list of my projects so you can tell me which one you want to fail while i'm wasting my time at your meeting. the boss: was there a chance one of them would succeed? wally: well played
Monday May 27,
2019
Wally's Reading Time
Tags #business, #meetings, #office, #office workers
Transcript
alice: wally, can we meet tomorrow at 8 am? wally: that's when i eat breakfast in the cafeteria. alice: how about 9 am? wally: that would bump into my bowel and reading time.