Window Control Comic Strips - Page 11

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View 101 - 110 results for window control comic strips. Discover the best "Window Control" comics from Dilbert.com.

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Share May 14, 2007's comic on:


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Catbert: Evil director of human resources<Br>"I've worked in a windowless cube for 25 years. Can I move to the vacant cube by the window?" "Sure." "GAAA!!! IT BURNS!" "Too fast."

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Share March 01, 2007's comic on:


Tags #estimates, #tax and shipping, #realx, #untight, #deep breath, #losing it

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Dilbert: Do your estimates include tax and shipping? Tina: Relax, relax, calm down." "There's no need to go all nuts about the tax and shipping. It's under control. Take a deep breath." Dilbert: Um...All I asked was..." " Tina: Gaaa! You're totally losing it now!"

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I'll ask the vendor for ballpark prices to see if the idea is feasible. "You can't talk with vendors until our change control board approves the project." "But that would require a cost-benefit analysis." "And I can't do that without ballpark prices from the vendor." "Just take your best guess." "So...I should make up a number so I can get approval to make a phone call and ask what the number should have been?" "Right. But first you need to get my approval to do the cost-benefit analysis." "Will you approve it?" "I'd have to see the numbers."

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Share December 09, 2006's comic on:


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I found a family of squirrels living inside our legacy system. "They control our payroll database. They're making demands." "Leave the acorns and no one will get their deductions increased."

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Share December 07, 2006's comic on:


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You work in a cubicle while your routers and servers have a private office with their own climate control. "The machines have taken over. Your job is to provide them with electricity." "And do you think those electronic voting machines care about your opinion?"

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"Dilbert, meet your new coworker, Phil O'Dendron." "Phil is a potted plant. He'll sit in your cubicle all day while you try to work." "Does it talk?" "He has three stories that he repeats in an infinite loop." "He'll begin with his reasons for why you should use his tax guy." "Then he'll do a recap of recent reality TV shows." "And last but not least, 'The way we did it at my last job.'" sob "How do you plan to cut expenses?" "Well, performance bonuses are under control."

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Share November 21, 2005's comic on:


Tags #hired abusive, #lying, #control freak, #difficult coworkers

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"I hired an abusive, lying, back-stabbing, control freak." "But don't worry, because I'm sending you to a class on how to deal with difficult coworkers." "Wouldn't it have been better to..." "I've heard bad things about that guy."

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Share October 06, 2005's comic on:


Tags #faq for wedsite, #anticipate questions, #questionaire

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I hired Mr. Dogbert to write the F.A.Q. for our web site. "The key is to anticipate our customers' most likely questions." "Question 1: Where does your CEO live? I need to know so I can throw your cruddy project through his biggest window."

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Share September 11, 2005's comic on:


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"Welcome to Dogbert's Anger Management Seminar." "My goal is to transform you from angry nuts into..." "Angry nuts who have paid me." "I need a volunteer for our first demonstration. You, come here." "Put your head about here." "Now try to control your anger while I do this..." WHAP WHAP WHAP WHAP WHAP "Maybe you didn't get enough sleep last night."

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Share August 20, 2005's comic on:


Tags #window facing cubicle, #available, #printer papaer, #free trip, #vendor, #sunlight, #bleach, #visible wood

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A prestigious window-facing cubicle has just become available. "It'll be a perfect place to store all the printer paper I bought so I could win a free trip from the paper vendor." "And maybe the sunlight wll bleach out the visible wood chips."