Customer Comic Strips - Page 11
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Character
216 Results for Customer
View 101 - 110 results for customer comic strips. Discover the best "Customer" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday August 16,
1991
Monday August 19,
1991
Tags Dogbert, convince, wealth, polyester, pants, top, head, money, change
Transcript
Dogbert sits across from a customer service representative in a bank. The woman says, "Well, Mr. Dogbert, what could I do to convince you to put your new wealth in our bank?" Dogbert replies, "Stretch your polyester pants over the top of your head." As the woman pulls her pants over her head, Dogbert says, "I hope money doesn't change me."
Saturday June 20,
1992
Tags Dilbert, bank, ethel, credit, banks, interest rate, filming, television, ads, Dogbert, attitude
Transcript
Dilbert stands in front of a customer service desk at a bank. Dilbert says, "I'd like to apply for a 'Bank of Ethel' credit card." The woman behind the desk says, "Sit down and shut up." The woman says, "It's 21% interest plus surprisingly high annual fees. We'll do a credit check and a full body cavity search." Back at home, Dilbert stands in front of Dogbert wearing just his boxers. Dilbert says, ". . . And I had to smile the whole time because they were filming it for their television ads." Dogbert says, "You have to admire their attitude."
Friday October 23,
1992
Tags Dogbert, dating, service, deep, down, fantasy, woman, modelled, brochure, francis, kris
Transcript
Dogbert sits at a desk under a sign that says, "Dogbert's Dating Service." A man says, "I'd like to sign up." The customer continues, "Although deep down I know that all of the people in your service are men, I cling to the fantasy of meeting the woman who modeled for your brochure." Dogbert says, "She's taken, but I can match you with somebody named 'Francis' or 'Kris.'" The man replies, "There's hope!"
Monday November 02,
1992
Tags failed, driving, test, nine, Dogbert, school, specialize, problem, application, form, special, pointy
Transcript
A customer sits across from Dogbert's desk. The boy says, "I've failed the driving test nine times. Can you help?" Dogbert replies, "I specialize in the problem cases. Just sign the application form." The boy looks at the pencil and says, "Wait . . . I've seen one of these before. Yes, there's something special about the pointy end . . . But what?" Dogbert thinks, "Uh oh."
Thursday December 17,
1992
Tags Dilbert, competitor, massage, helga, company, offer, house
Transcript
Dilbert sits across from a customer's desk wearing a suit and carrying a briefcase. The customer says, "Your competitor was here an hour ago . . ." The man points to a woman holding a towel and massage oil and says, "He promised me a massage from Helga if I buy from his company. What's your offer?" Dilbert replies, "I'll give you my house for Helga." The man says, "You're new at this . . ."
Friday January 14,
1994
Tags Dogbert, reincarnation fund, rich already, customer, needs help, van
Transcript
Dogbert: Invest you money in my reincarnation fund and you'll be rich in a future life. Man: But I a rich in this life, for I have love in my heart and music in my soul. So, can you help me push my van home? Dogbert: It looks like you'll also have sharp pain in your muscles.
Monday March 07,
1994
Saturday March 26,
1994
Tags device, dogcart scam, end of world, evil be gone, evil money, give money, scammer, take money
Transcript
Dogbert: The end of the world is coming in the year 2000. Therefore, you should give me your money before its too late. Dogbert: It is written that money is evil, I'll keep your money in Dogberts special "evil be gone" device. And its completely deductible. ...from your savings. CUSTOMER: So Im actually making money!
Friday April 08,
1994
Tags lottery tickets, sale, value, yesterdays lottery, half priced lottery, cheat, scam, Dogbert, salesman, scammer, office dog, customer
Transcript
"What makes these a 'value'?" "Value priced lottery tickets" "They're half the normal price, and yet the chance of winning is only one in ten million less." "Hey! This is for yesterday's lottery!" "And your point is...?


