Date You Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

202 Results for Date You

View 101 - 110 results for date you comic strips. Discover the best "Date You" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #therapy, #unethical, #Dilbert, #biological clock, #ugly, #one, #ticking, #away

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert lies on a couch in a psychiatrist's office. The therapist says, "Frankly, I'm tired of hearing your little problems . . ." The psychologist says, "I hate my job . . . I haven't had a decent date in a year . . . My biological clock is ticking away . . ." Dilbert asks, "Would it be unethical to date one of your patients?" The doctor replies, "Yes, especially an ugly one."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #woman, #trapped, #dog's, #body, #operation, #electrolysis, #costs

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a dog in a dress sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert thinks, "That is absolutely the LAST blind date." Judy says, ". . . Then I realized . . ." Judy continues, "I'm a woman trapped in a dog's body . . . So, now I'm saving for a species change operation." Dilbert asks, "Is it expensive?" Judy replies, "Well, you can imagine the electrolysis costs alone."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #helen, #man, #resume, #requested, #formula, #calculate, #ratio, #height, #baldness, #Men, #different, #nights

View Transcript

Transcript

Man: I hope you'll date me now, Helen. I brought my resume as you requested. Helen: There's a little formula I use to calculate the ratio of your earnings potential to your height and baldness... Hmm... You pass. Of course, I'll still date other men too. Man: On different nights?

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #date, #new, #system, #evaluating, #check, #boxes, #Card, #night, #dinged, #point, #nervous, #twitch, #head, #block, #bucket

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "I'm using a new system for evaluating my dates. I just check off boxes on this card throughout the night." The woman continues, "There . . . I just dinged you a point for that nervous twitch." The woman asks, "Would you say your head is more like a block or a bucket?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #bug, #computer, #program, #long, #date, #Women, #relationships

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. Dilbert says, ". . . So, then I thought, ha! Maybe there's a bug in the computer program itself!" The woman reaches into her purse. The woman sprays Dilbert with a can of mace and he screams. Dilbert says, "Maybe that story went on a little long . . ." The woman asks, "What gave it away?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #rats, #ratbert, #cuddling, #frisbee, #ears, #appreciative, #scratch, #Dilbert

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits at his desk and Ratbert stands on the desk. Ratbert says, "Forget Dogbert; I can be your new best friend!" Ratbert continues, "Rats are twice as good for cuddling and you should see me catch a frisbee!" Ratbert points to his head and says, "Here, scratch behind my ears. You'll find me most appreciative!" Dilbert says, "You sound like me on a date."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #ginger, #date, #puppetitis, #rare, #disorder, #puppet, #weird

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "I haven't dated much since I came down with puppetitis." The woman continues, "It's a rare disorder that makes your hand act like a puppet." Dilbert replies, "That's weird." The woman moves her hand like a puppet and says, "He hates us! We must kill him!" The woman says to her hand, "Not yet, Ginger!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #nineties, #puppet, #puppetitis, #date, #disease, #join, #hand

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "I caught the disease puppetitis from somebody I dated." The woman moves her hand like a puppet and says, "Ha ha! That's right! Now her hand is a puppet!" Dilbert thinks, "I hate the nineties." The woman's puppet hand says, "Join us . . . Don't be afraid."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #fiasco, #rare, #disease, #puppetitis, #hand, #puppet, #catch

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert says to Dogbert, "My date was a fiasco." Dilbert continues, "She has a rare disease called puppetitis - it makes your hand act like a puppet." Dilbert continues, "Apparently you can catch it by holding hands." Dilbert moves his hand like a puppet and says, "But it was worth it."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #self-centered, #jerks, #woman, #dating, #date, #different, #considerate, #ugly

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "Most handsome men are self-centered jerks." The woman continues, "But you're different . . . You're . . ." Dilbert asks, "Considerate?" The woman replies, "Ugly."