Long Debate Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

383 Results for Long Debate

View 101 - 110 results for long debate comic strips. Discover the best "Long Debate" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #judicial proceedings, #lawyer, #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #hypothetical, #hypocracy, #jury duty, #standing, #less, #people, #executioner, #client

View Transcript

Transcript

The defense lawyer says, "Okay, let's say that, hypothetically, my client did kill those people . . ." His client is holding an ax and wearing an executioner's hat. The attorney says to Dilbert and the other members of the jury, "Chances are that it was nobody you know." The lawyer continues, "And the next time you're standing in a long line, ask yourself: 'Am I better off now that there are less people?'"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #woman, #single, #clues, #hair

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "Clues from women's hair." An arrow points at a woman with long hair and a caption says, "This woman is single." An arrow points at a woman with short hair and a caption says, "The same woman, now married." An arrow points at a woman with bags under her eyes and hair standing on end and a caption says, "Married, two kids."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #sweat, #bugs, #alone, #pen, #mind, #weird, #entire, #body, #shaved, #levitate

View Transcript

Transcript

The caption says, "When you're alone, you start thinking weird thoughts." Dilbert sits in his desk chair thinking, "Do bugs sweat?" The caption says, "The longer you're alone, the weirder it gets." Dilbert holds a pen in his palm and thinks, "I can levitate this pen with my mind." The caption says, "Don't stay alone too long." Dilbert sits in his house thinking, "How would it feel if I shaved my entire body."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #Dogbert, #dangerous, #fridge, #ketchup, #study, #experiment, #prank

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert says, "As long as you're here, Ratbert, I could use your help." Ratbert says, "At your service!" Dogbert opens the refrigerator and says, "I'd like you to test the stuff in the fridge and see if it's dangerous." Ratbert's head is stuck inside a ketchup bottle. He says to Dogbert, "Put a question mark by ketchup." Dogbert marks his clipboard.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #fanfare, #sorrowful, #friends, #bye, #lab

View Transcript

Transcript

Ratbert says, "I must get back to the lab now. But please, no long goodbyes, or parting gifts, or fanfare." Ratbert continues, "Nay, let us simply drink in the richness of this beautiful yet sorrowful moment. Two friends who . . ." Dogbert interrupts, "'Bye." Ratbert says, "That's what I meant to say: 'bye."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #turtle, #pet, #Dogbert, #complete, #application, #lived, #shell

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: Before I can consider you as my pet turtle, you must complete this application. Turtle: Okay, if that's your policy... "How long have you lived in your current shell?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad stocks, #disclose holdings, #money, #newsletter, #stock market, #stock picker, #traded stocks, #pumpanddump

View Transcript

Transcript

Dogbert: I'm starting a pump-and-dump newsletter for thinly traded stocks. It's legal as long as I disclose my holdings and my bad stock picks can be attributed to honest mistakes. Meet my stock picker. Coworker: All shhtocks go up!

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #Dilbert, #confirmation, #hearing, #supreme court, #senator, #starve, #death, #downside

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair watching Dogbert's confirmation hearing on television. A voice says, "The senator has 34 seconds . . ." Dilbert thinks, "I wonder what would happen if you let them talk as long as they wanted." Dilbert thinks, "I'll bet they'd starve to death. But there's probably a downside."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #electric, #razor, #burn, #face, #joke, #toaster, #shave, #problem

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert sits in his chair reading the newspaper and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "Do you know the difference between an electric razor and a toaster?" Dilbert replies, "No." Dogbert says, "No??? Geez, it must take you a long time to shave. Do you burn your face a lot?" Dilbert says, "I thought you were telling a joke." Dogbert asks, "How long have you had this problem?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #elves, #elf, #magic, #elf magic, #conquer, #world, #pick, #Card, #serious, #clubs, #forty three of clubs

View Transcript

Transcript

An elf says to three other elves, "I say we elves have been pushed around too long!" The elf says, "Let's use our elf magic to conquer the world!!" Another elf replies, "Yeah! Elf magic!" An elf holds a deck of playing cards and says to Dogbert, "C'mon, pick a card - any card!! And this time be serious!!" Dogbert says, "I'll take the forty-three of clubs."