Merged Network Comic Strips - Page 11

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

108 Results for Merged Network

View 101 - 108 results for merged network comic strips. Discover the best "Merged Network" comics from Dilbert.com.

Dogbert's Class Learns Nothing

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Dogbert's Class Learns Nothing - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #distraction, #strategy, #guest artist, #josh shipley

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The employees who took your class on negotiating are complaining that they learned nothing. Dogbert: I heart those same employees scheming to vandalize your network. Boss: Now that's all I can think about! How did you do that? Dogbert: Gotta go.

Boss Buys Software Without Help

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Buys Software Without Help - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad advice, #Advice, #sales, #lying, #deception, #business

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I bought new software for our network. Dilbert: Who helped you on the technical side? Boss: The vendor. He said our current software uses the wrong kind of electricity.

Fake Email From The Ceo

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Fake Email From The Ceo - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #virus, #infection, #malware, #technology, #typo, #literacy

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: I can't delete the Elbonian virus in our network. It keeps replicating. Holy carp! It created a fake email full of typos and bad ideas and sent it out from our CEO's account! Wait, no. That's actually from our CEO. Wally: Maybe the virus can fix him.

Boss Finds A Thumb Drive

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Boss Finds A Thumb Drive  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #computers, #infection, #malware, #obliviousness, #virus, #hacker, #hacking

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: I found a thumb drive on the sidewalk. It must be my lucky day. It's like free money! Dilbert: Can free money infect our network, too? Boss: You worry too much. Dilbert: If you need me, I'll be selling all of my company stock.

Virus Gives Everyone A Raise

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Virus Gives Everyone A Raise  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #virus, #infection, #computer, #malware, #morals, #salary, #technology, #money

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The Elbonian virus in our network just gave ever employee an ten percent raise. You have to get rid of the virus! Dilbert: If the Elbonian software is giving me a raise, and you're trying to sop it, wouldn't that make you the virus?

Unplugged Server

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Unplugged Server - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #server, #obliviousness, #cell phone, #phone, #charging, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Dilbert: The network has been down all morning, but we found the problem. Some idiot unplugged the server so he could charge his phone. So, that problem has been solved. Boss: Great. Now can you help me find my lost phone?

Everyone Else Is Worthless

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
Everyone Else Is Worthless - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #fire, #pawn, #problems, #project, #the boss, #useless, #work

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: I'm adding you to the network upgrade project. Everyone else on the team is lazy and useless, so I need you to do all of their work. Dilbert: Maybe you should fire them. The Boss: Don't try to pawn off your problems on me.

No Internet

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
No Internet - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #complaining, #engineering, #office workers, #technology

View Transcript

Transcript

Boss: The network will be down all day, but try to do what you can without it. Dilbert: What can we do without it besides drink coffee, complain, and whittle? Boss: No knives at work. Dilbert: Hold off on the whittling.