Try Rebooting Comic Strips - Page 11

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478 Results for Try Rebooting

View 101 - 110 results for try rebooting comic strips. Discover the best "Try Rebooting" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 1995's comic on:


Tags #Catbert, #hr director, #new org chart, #so close, #too bad, #play before firing, #downsized

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Catbert stands on a cubicle wall waving a document. Catbert says to Alice, "Here's the new org chart. Maybe you're on it and maybe not." Alice jumps up and tries to reach the sheet as Catbert holds it out of reach. Catbert taunts, "Ooh! Nice try! So close. Too bad." Catbert ties the chart to a string and dangles it into the cubicles. Wally and Alice lunge for it. Catbert says, "It's fun to play with them before downsizing them."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 07, 1995's comic on:


Tags #improve career, #ceo, #refer first name, #recent meeting, #rule, #iron fist, #funny dog

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Dilbert and Dogbert are sitting on the couch. Dogbert says, "Try this little trick to improve your career . . ." Dogbert continues, "Anytime you want something your way, simply refer to your CEO by his first name and say he gave you directions during your very recent meeting." Dogbert continues, "It's totally unverifiable. People will fear you and do as you say. You'll rule with an iron fist!" Dilbert responds, "You're a funny little dog."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 16, 1995's comic on:


Tags #marketings approval, #flex power, #useless data, #major stallion, #wife address

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Dilbert stands in front of a the Vice President of Marketing's desk. The VP reads a document and says, "I could give you marketing's approval right now . . ." The VP continues, "Or I could flex my vice presidential power and send you to gather more useless data . . . My ego would expand and I'd be a major stallion with my wife tonight." The VP asks Dilbert, "Do you think you can top that?" Dilbert replies, "Ill try, sir. What's your wife's address?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 18, 1995's comic on:


Tags #business case, #various mangers, #being misplaced, #kill for personal gain, #buried, #not cremeated, #lasting impression, #earth, #mail corpse

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Dilbert arrives at home and says to Dogbert, "Today I distributed 36 copies of my business case to various managers for approval." Dilbert sits on the armrest of the couch and continues, "By my count, 20 are being misplaced, 6 managers will try to kill it for personal gain and 10 will come back with irrelevant questions." Dilbert says, "When I die I want to be buried, not cremated, so I can at least make ONE lasting impression on the earth." Dogbert says, "I was planning to mail your corpse to somebody I don't like."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 13, 1995's comic on:


Tags #start documenting, #market requirements, #design skills, #rewarding, #work, #doo hickey

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Dilbert and Stan from marketing sit at a conference table. As he types on a laptop, Dilbert tells Stan, "Okay, let's start by documenting your market requirements." Stan responds, "No, let's start by you telling me all the things you can design. Then I'll tell you which one I like." Dilbert says, "Work can be very rewarding. You should try it." Stan points to Dilbert's portable PC and asks, "What's that doohickey you have there?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share July 28, 1995's comic on:


Tags #bob procurement, #duties are simple, #assume employees lie, #multimedia laptop, #demo labeler, #low cost substitutes, #savings, #accomplishments

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His boss in procurement explains to Bob the Dinosaur, "Your duties are simple. People will come to you and ask for things." Bob's boss continues, "Assume all employees are lying, treasure-hunting thieves. Give them low-cost substitutes and claim the savings on your accomplishments." An employee says to Bob, "I asked for a multimedia laptop PC. This is a 'Dymo' labeler." Bob responds, "Nice try, Paul, if that's your real name."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 24, 1995's comic on:


Tags #dilbert expense voucher, #meals on trip, #travel guidelines, #pigeon, #hotel, #travel iron, #taking long, #wool setting

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Dilbert is tied up and hanging upside down. A demonlike clerk says to him, "You spent nearly $10 per day on meals during your trip." The clerk continues, "The travel guidelines require you to stun a pigeon with your briefcase on the way to the hotel then fry it up on your travel iron." Dilbert responds, "I tried . . . but it was taking so long." The clerk suggests, "Try the 'wool' setting."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 29, 1995's comic on:


Tags #tweaking brittle, #brittle people, #tech wroter, #forms of expression, #insult gender, #tina, #orgs of expression, #venus de milo, #Women, #lift heavy objects

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Dogbert stands behind Dilbert's desk and says, "I feel like tweaking some brittle people. Do you known any brittle people?" Dilbert responds, "Try Tina the tech writer. She believes that all forms of expression are an insult to her gender and her profession." Dogbert says to Tina, "The statue of 'Venus de Milo' has no arms." Tina replies angrily, "Oh, I get it. You're saying that women can't lift heavy objects."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 21, 1995's comic on:


Tags #tech support, #bob, #newest manuver, #turban wedgie, #regular wedgie

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Dogbert sits on the armrest of a couch. Dilbert, with a phone in his hand, says, "I've been on hold for tech support since Tuesday. Get Bob and meet me in the car." Dilbert is driving with Dogbert in the passenger seat. Bob the Dinosaur says from the back seat, "I can't wait to try my newest maneuver, the 'Turban Wedgie.'" Bob is holding the tech support person in the air. The tech support person has a turban on his head. Bob says to Dilbert, "It starts like a regular wedgie then I wrap it around his head." Dilbert says, "Question . . ."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 04, 1995's comic on:


Tags #Dogbert, #corporate jet pilot, #captain dogbert, #first flight, #training budget, #look out window, #jump, #in case of crash

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Dogbert sits in the cockpit of an airplane. He says, "Attention, passenger." Dogbert continues, "I'm Captain Dogbert. This is my first flight. I'll bet you wish you hadn't cut the corporate training budget." The passenger, the CEO of the company, looks shocked. Dogbert continues, "For safety, keep an eye out the window . . . If it looks like we're gonna hit the ground, try jumping up right before impact." The passenger looks scared.