White Water Comic Strips - Page 11
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Wally addresses a meeting, "My first act as temporary boss is revamping our project status color codes." Wally points to a slide and says, "Red, yellow, and green will be replaced by white, off-white, and eggshell." Wally continues, "I have to confess, it was embarrassing to realize I only have one idea."
The highly productive but useless guy Heres a copy of my white paper. Its a statistical analysis of the correlation between disk storage and employee absenteeism. I oddment know how to do statistics but ut doesn't matter because I didn't have data.
Dilbert: Our new product is either wildly successful or underwater... DIlbert: depending on ho you want to allocate management over head expenses. Dilbert: Apparently you don't want to think about it and get back to me
Caption: "The Feng Shui Consultant" Dogbert stands on the boss' desk and says, "This office is swarming with evil spirits" The Boss says, "It is?" Dogbert says, "There's one in your vent! Ooh - he ducked back in before you saw him." Dogbert says, "Put Rubber bands around your pant legs to keep the spirits out of your trousers." Dogbert says, "I figure the evil spirits will mount - a rear assault through that window." Dogbert screams. Dogbert's ears fly up. Dogbert says, "It's gone now." The boss says, "What did you see?!" Dogbert says, "It's gone now." The boss hides under his desk. Dogbert wags his tail and says, "Your only hope is to turn your secretary's cubicle intoa koi pond." Dilbert stnad by Carol's cubicle which is now filled with water and a leaping fish. Carol sits in the water wearing a scuba mask. Dilbert says, "Do you feel any luckier?" Carol curses.
The Boss: "Don't blame me, but there's no budget to give you a raise this year." Alice: "Why not?" The boss: "My business trip to Las Vegas cost four million dollars because I passed out in the bathtub with the water running and flooded five floors." The boss; "The bartenders there are totally irresponsible."
"Carol, shred this." "The shredder is right behind you, next to the fax." "What if I do it wrong?" "Only a complete moron could do it wrong." "Um...I think I might have just faxed our strategy someplace." "And that's why you never see a water fountain in a men's restroom."
"We canceled our plant maintenance contract to save money." "Each employee will adopt a nearby plant and water it." The Unluckiest Plant in the Whole World "Now when I pour my coffee dregs on you, it will look like work!" "Must...run..."