Wouldn't Be Threat Comic Strips - Page 12
260 Results for Wouldn't Be Threat
View 111 - 120 results for wouldn't be threat comic strips. Discover the best "Wouldn't Be Threat" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share December 26, 2001's comic on:
Dilbert says to The Boss, "I need your approval for this expense. The equipment is already here and installed." Dilbert continues, "I left out the description because you wouldn't understand it anyway." The Boss says to Catbert, "There's a fine line between managing and being totally useless." Catbert responds, "Luckily it looks the same."
Share January 22, 2002's comic on:
Headline: Dilbert the Sales Guy. Dilbert's mom is holding his product. She says, "I wouldn't buy this @#!%!!& with YOUR money." Dilbert's mom continues, "It's overpriced, hard to use, full of bugs and it solves no problem." Dilbert's mom continues, "I spit on your packaging!" Dilbert responds, "Um.. Mom.."
Share April 20, 2002's comic on:
Alice asks The Boss, "How about any Tuesday this year?" The Boss replies, "No, I'm booked." Alice says, "You have the highest ratio of unavailability to usefulness I've ever seen." The Boss asks Catbert, "Does that sound like an insult?" Catbert replies, "If I could do math I wouldn't be working in human resources."
Share May 29, 2002's comic on:
Wally is walking down the hallway with a metal detector. Alice asks him, "Wally, what do you expect to find here with a metal detector?" Wally responds, "My first choice is some sort of priceless treasure. But I wouldn't say no to a bottle cap." Alice leaves and Wally thinks to himself, "I finally find my calling in life and I waste all day explaining it."
Share June 04, 2002's comic on:
Dilbert says to The Boss, "We sure have a lot of vacant offices since the layoffs." Dilbert continues, "I wouldn't mind having a nice office with an actual door. Why don't you let me have one?" The Boss responds, "Okay, take one." Dilbert shakes with anger and exclaims, "STOP TOYING WITH ME!"
Share July 09, 2002's comic on:
The Boss says to Wally, "Wally, it's your turn to be in charge while I'm on vacation." The Boss continues, "But whatever you do, do NOT sit in my chair. It wouldn't be right." Wally shakes his rear end in front of The Boss' chair and says, "Ooh-baby! you want some of this. Yes, you do."
Share August 01, 2002's comic on:
The Boss addresses a meeting, "Starting today, our goals will be replaced by stretch goals." Asok asks, "Stretch goals?" Alice says, "Stretch goals are like stretch pants. It's a way of signaling surrender." Asok puts up both arms in surrender. Alice says, "Speaking of which, I wouldn't say no to a doughnut."
Share November 13, 2002's comic on:
Headline: The Short-timer. The Boss says to the short-timer, "You're retiring soon, so you can give me honest feedback." The short-timer responds, "Wouldn't that be harder than doing absolutely nothing?" The short-timer continues, "How about if I create the illusion of listening while I fantasize about fishing?" The Boss responds, "Good enough."
Share November 28, 2002's comic on:
The Boss picks up a T-Shirt that says "Wow" and exclaims, "Each of you will get a shirt as part of my war on waste program!" Dilbert responds, "I wouldn't wear that shirt at home or in the office, so what good is..." Wally blows his nose loudly into a shirt, "Honk!" Dilbert says, "Oh. Nevermind."
Share February 28, 2003's comic on:
Headline: The Toxic Co-worker. Toxic Tom approaches Alice and says, "You wouldn't believe what people are saying about you." Toxic Tom continues, "I tried to defend you. I said you look slow only because you're bloated." Toxic Tom continues, "But what ticks me off is that everyone in the department earns more than you do." Alice clenches her teeth and holds back her fist.