Expiration Date Comic Strips - Page 12

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198 Results for Expiration Date

View 111 - 120 results for expiration date comic strips. Discover the best "Expiration Date" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 19, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #date, #men and women, #dating, #twins, #telepath, #normal, #thoughts, #guy

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Dilbert sits at a table in a restaurant with a two-headed woman. Dilbert says, "Believe it or not, this is the first time I've ever dated a two-headed telepath." The women look frightened. Dilbert says, "You might pick up a strange thought or two, but believe me, these are normal thoughts for a guy . . ." Dilbert says, "Well, maybe not that last one . . ." The woman grabs the tablecloth and looks shocked.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 14, 1993's comic on:


Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #alice, #business meeting

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The Boss, Dilbert, Alice and another employee sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Does anybody have any questions about our plan? Ask me anything - there are no 'stupid' questions." A man asks, "If you crossed the international date line on your birthday, would you still get presents?" The Boss thinks, "Oh great . . . There ARE stupid questions and I don't know the answers."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 28, 1993's comic on:


Tags #ted, #Dilbert, #job offer, #office

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Dilbert sits at his desk. A man asks, "Have I told you recently that I have a lucrative job offer from our competitor?" Dilbert replies, "Yes." The man continues, "The pay is obscene, they wear casual clothes at work, and Wednesday through Friday is free beer and pizza." The man continues, "As the new guy I get to date the masseuse until the company matches me with an attractive co-worker." Dilbert covers his eyes and sobs.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 21, 1994's comic on:


Tags #dilbert date, #asks lunch date, #cheryl, #full of lunch, #rejection, #next week, #turned down, #lame excuse, #office, #co worker

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Dilbert: Hi Cheryl. would you like to have lunch with me next week? Cheryl: I..uh...already ate lunch. Im not hungry. Dilbert: Im talking about next week!! Cheryl: I don't think I can have another bite, all full.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 22, 1994's comic on:


Tags #lunch date, #rejction, #says she's dead, #seeing an illusion

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Tina: Lunch? With you? I'd love to but...uh... Tina: Im clinically dead, what you see are merely the last involuntary spasms before I stiffen. Dilbert: I have a hand truck. Tina: this was a very bad idea.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share March 23, 1994's comic on:


Tags #date, #lisa, #coffee at work, #wash hair, #saturday night, #dinner date, #rejected, #clean hair

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Dilbert: Lisa, I was wondering if you'd like to go to dinner saturday night. Lisa: Uh...I have to wash my hair saturday. how about having coffee here at work instead? Dilbert: I'll pass. I was hoping for someone with clean hair.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share April 09, 1994's comic on:


Tags #bad luck, #lottery tickets, #fabulous wealth, #delight, #hedonistic, #yesterdays date, #old, #expired, #scam, #scammer, #cheater, #rat, #dog, #animals

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"Value priced lottery tickets" Ratbert: "I am drawn by the allure of fabulous wealth and a life of hedonistic delight...one please." "This is dated yesterday." Dogbert: "Ooh, bad luck. Try again?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 18, 1994's comic on:


Tags #no ring, #dilbert asks liz, #date, #pizza date, #after game, #big ring, #eunuchs, #special van, #flop sweat, #kidding, #joke, #gullible, #likes gullible

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"Liz, I noticed you're not wearing a ring. Would you like to go for a pizza after the game?" "Oh, I do have a ring. It's so big I can't wear it. A team of eunuchs follows me around with it in a special van." "Flop-sweat time." "You're gullible. I like that."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share June 25, 1994's comic on:


Tags #date, #dilbert nervous, #date aware, #hypotheisis, #hold hands, #one clammy, #hand loses ontrol

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LIZ: I can tell that you like me because you don't quite know what to do with your hands. DILBERT: To test my hypothesis I will hold this hand and observe the change. LIZ" The "Control" hand remains limp and clammy. It twin loses control, Hypothesis confirmed. thupa thupa thupa thupa thupa

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share February 17, 1995's comic on:


Tags #the problem, #under staffed, #six weeks, #behind, #the analysis, #add people, #the result, #daily stats reports, #situation

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The caption reads, "The problem . . ." Dilbert enters looking frazzled and says to the Boss, "We're so under-staffed that the project is six weeks behind schedule." The caption reads, "The analysis . . ." The Boss looks pensive and thinks, "I can't add people . . . I can't change the due date . . . I can't ignore it." The caption reads, "The result . . ." Dilbert says to Wally and Alice, "He wants daily status reports until the situation improves." All three look overworked and disheveled.