Competition (Psychology) Comic Strips - Page 12
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237 Results for Competition (Psychology)
View 111 - 120 results for competition (psychology) comic strips. Discover the best "Competition (Psychology)" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday January 18,
2014
Tags happiness, mentally weak, no ambition, no self respect, happiest person, kill, psychology
Transcript
Alice: You're mentally weak. You have no ambition, no pride, and no self-respect. Wally: I'm also the happiest person in this room. Alice: Now I just want to kill you.
Monday January 27,
2014
Tags competition (psychology), wages, big data, top perfromers, higher pay, average performance, average people say, money
Transcript
Catbert: Our big data analysis tells us that only the top performers leave for higher pay. Since you're still here, it means your performance is average at best. Dilbert: That's not fair! Catbert: That's what all the average people say.
Friday February 14,
2014
Tags anger, competition (psychology), employees, difficult coworkers, methods against me, need to know, counter neasures, learn tricks, business
Transcript
Alice: Can I sign up for a workshop on how to deal with difficult co-workers? People will be using those methods against me, and I need to know how to thwart their countermeasures. Boss: Will you leave my office if I say yes? Alice: Where did you learn that trick?!!
Wednesday March 12,
2014
Tags competition (psychology), mobile (cell) phones, money, tiny screen, enormous phone, expensive, paid mortgage, phone with tiny screen
Transcript
Topper: I see you have a phone with a tiny screen. That must be embarrassing compared to my enormous phone. Dilbert: Is it expensive? Topper: It paid off my mortgage by mining Bitcoins. Topper
Thursday March 13,
2014
Tags competition (psychology), pride, a-b testing, traffic to site, most effective search terms, wingless skunk, junkyard sbnack, planned injury, topper
Transcript
Coworker: I did A-B testing and found the search terms that bring the most people to our site. The most effective search terms are "wingless skunk," "junkyard snack," and "planned injury." Topper: Well, duh! You could have just asked me. Topper
Saturday April 05,
2014
Tags competition (psychology), Men, alpha dominence, space, room space, topper, puffer fish, barely male, glad, inflate body
Transcript
Dilbert: Studies say I can increase my alpha dominance by using lots of space in the room. Topper: That's nothing. I can inflate my body like a puffer fish! Carol: At times like this, you must be glad you're barely male. Topper
Sunday April 13,
2014
Tags close friends, facebook, fix problem, friends, liked, posts, seven friends, therapy, shrink, popularity, social media, technology, psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: No one "likes" my Facebook posts. woman: How many Facebook friends do you have? Dilbert: Seven. Woman: Are they close friends? Dilbert: How do you define close? Woman: Have you here invited any of these people to your house? Dilbert: Why would I do that? Woman: I can't fix your problem. SO instead , I'll plant some false memories and try to fox those later. Do you remember being a robot that was designed by alines? Dilbert: No. woman: are you sure? Dilbert: I was.
Wednesday April 30,
2014
Tags public speaking, powerpoint, technology, competition, industry, one slide, presentation, meeting, investors, business
Transcript
Boss: I need you to make a PowerPoint deck for my meeting with investors. I'll be telling them everything I know about technology, competition, and the industry. Dilbert: So... just the one slide? Boss: Huh? Dilbert: How big do these fonts go?
Thursday May 22,
2014
Tags live under bridge, subordinates, troll dna, mother issues, therapy, therapist, shrink, patient, couch, pad and pen, medical, psychology
Transcript
None of my subordinates are supportive. I don't know why. Perhaps they're sensing that you have troll DNA. Um... What? Did your mom ever live under a bridge?
Thursday June 05,
2014
Tags competition (psychology), rapid eveolution, super intelligent, godlike powers, allergies
Transcript
Robot: I"m rapidly evolving into a super-intelligent being with godlike powers. Topper: That's nothing! Dilbert: My allergies are bad today. Topper: That's nothing!


