Dating Comic Strips - Page 12

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150 Results for Dating

View 111 - 120 results for dating comic strips. Discover the best "Dating" comics from Dilbert.com.

App For Hiring Decisions

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App For Hiring Decisions - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags mansplaining, tech, programmers, coders, interview, hiring, stereotype

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Boss: No need to talk. Now we use an app to make hiring decisions. The app checked your online footprint and says you're a serial mansplainer with an unsuccessful dating history. I assume that means you have awesome technical skills. Interviewee: Full stack!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags dating, social, social interaction, honesty, politeness, overshare, relationships

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Woman: So, tell me a little about yourself, and be totally honest. Dilbert: Totally honest? Okay... I like technology more than I like people. I don't believe in free will, soulmates, or following my passion. I think life is a brief, meaningless event in a random universe that doesn't care. I only associate with other people because I have biological and economical needs. I think all human actions are driven by selfishness. Woman: Uh... okay. Do you have any questions for me? Dilbert: Am I still being totally honest or should I act curious?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags flirting, dating, negotiation, rebuff, rejection, social media, relationships, technology

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Dilbert: My name is Dilbert. Would you like to make out? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I take you on a date? Woman: No. Dilbert: Lunch? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I have your number so I can text you? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I be your Facebook friend? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I follow you on Twitter? Woman: Fine. But no retweeting. Dilbert: Can I favorite your tweets? Woman: Only if you wear a glove on your mouse hand.

Alice Attracts Wrong Guys

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Alice Attracts Wrong Guys - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags stalk, stalker, stalking, dating, drone, spying, spy, relationships

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Alice: I have a history of dating men who become stalkers. But I have a good feeling about this new guy. He shows no stalker tendencies at all. Dilbert: What's he do for a living? Alice: Aerial photography using drones.

Alice Breaks Up With Boyfriend

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 Alice Breaks Up With Boyfriend - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags breakup, dating, breaking up, drone, stalking, follow, spying, attention, relationships

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Alice: I'm breaking up with you because you don't give me enough attention. All you care about is your stupid aerial photography hobby. I wish you the best. That felt like a clean break.

Going Double Digital

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Going Double Digital - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags attention, distraction, technology, watch, relationships, dating, smart phone, smart watch

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Tina: I broke up with my boyfriend because we went double-digital. I got used to sharing time with his phone, bu the hasn't made eye contact since he unboxed his Apple watch. Dilbert: Ooh. Weather. Tina: Did you hear anything I just said?

Dilbert's External Brain Stimulator

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Dilbert's External Brain Stimulator - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags first impressions, personality, fake, honesty, negativity, negative, criticism, dating, attraction, relationships, psychology

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Dilbert: I invented an external brain stimulator to regulate my moods. Woman: That means your personality is artificial. How can I be attracted to a fake person? Dilbert: Are you saying your baseline personality is an unpleasant drunk? Woman: What?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, unemployment, replacement, obsolete, app, job, jobs, dating, logic, business, relationships

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Woman: ...and that's what I do for a living. What do you do? Dilbert: I'm building an app that will make your entire industry obsolete. I'm almost done. It looks pretty good. Woman: You're destroying my life! Dilbert: No, I'm only making the app. The app will be destroying your life. Woman: This got awkward, but I'm attracted to smart men, so... would you like to go out this weekend? Dilbert: I don't think that's a good idea. I can't get past your dead-end career.

How Amazing The Weekend Was

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How Amazing The Weekend Was - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags relationships, friendship, small talk, love, dating, frustration, obliviousness, conversation

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Boss: Do you want to hear how amazing my weekend was? Alice: No. Would you like to hear about the extended tragedy that is my social life? Boss: No. I went to the mountains. Alice: I fell in love with a dying polygamist.

Yoga For Posture

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Yoga For Posture - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags yoga, posture, dating, attraction, Women, relationships

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Dilbert: I don't know what to do about my bad posture. Dogbert: Try yoga. Dilbert: Ooh, good idea. That will also improve my odds of meeting an attractive yoga-loving woman. Man: That was my plan too, but the full-stack guys gut here early and scared away the yoga women.