Dating Comic Strips - Page 12
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150 Results for Dating
View 111 - 120 results for dating comic strips. Discover the best "Dating" comics from Dilbert.com.
Monday April 06,
2015
App For Hiring Decisions
Tags mansplaining, tech, programmers, coders, interview, hiring, stereotype
Transcript
Boss: No need to talk. Now we use an app to make hiring decisions. The app checked your online footprint and says you're a serial mansplainer with an unsuccessful dating history. I assume that means you have awesome technical skills. Interviewee: Full stack!
Sunday May 24,
2015
Tags dating, social, social interaction, honesty, politeness, overshare, relationships
Transcript
Woman: So, tell me a little about yourself, and be totally honest. Dilbert: Totally honest? Okay... I like technology more than I like people. I don't believe in free will, soulmates, or following my passion. I think life is a brief, meaningless event in a random universe that doesn't care. I only associate with other people because I have biological and economical needs. I think all human actions are driven by selfishness. Woman: Uh... okay. Do you have any questions for me? Dilbert: Am I still being totally honest or should I act curious?
Sunday May 31,
2015
Tags flirting, dating, negotiation, rebuff, rejection, social media, relationships, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: My name is Dilbert. Would you like to make out? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I take you on a date? Woman: No. Dilbert: Lunch? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I have your number so I can text you? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I be your Facebook friend? Woman: No. Dilbert: Can I follow you on Twitter? Woman: Fine. But no retweeting. Dilbert: Can I favorite your tweets? Woman: Only if you wear a glove on your mouse hand.
Wednesday June 17,
2015
Alice Attracts Wrong Guys
Tags stalk, stalker, stalking, dating, drone, spying, spy, relationships
Transcript
Alice: I have a history of dating men who become stalkers. But I have a good feeling about this new guy. He shows no stalker tendencies at all. Dilbert: What's he do for a living? Alice: Aerial photography using drones.
Thursday June 18,
2015
Alice Breaks Up With Boyfriend
Tags breakup, dating, breaking up, drone, stalking, follow, spying, attention, relationships
Transcript
Alice: I'm breaking up with you because you don't give me enough attention. All you care about is your stupid aerial photography hobby. I wish you the best. That felt like a clean break.
Saturday July 18,
2015
Going Double Digital
Tags attention, distraction, technology, watch, relationships, dating, smart phone, smart watch
Transcript
Tina: I broke up with my boyfriend because we went double-digital. I got used to sharing time with his phone, bu the hasn't made eye contact since he unboxed his Apple watch. Dilbert: Ooh. Weather. Tina: Did you hear anything I just said?
Tuesday August 18,
2015
Dilbert's External Brain Stimulator
Tags first impressions, personality, fake, honesty, negativity, negative, criticism, dating, attraction, relationships, psychology
Transcript
Dilbert: I invented an external brain stimulator to regulate my moods. Woman: That means your personality is artificial. How can I be attracted to a fake person? Dilbert: Are you saying your baseline personality is an unpleasant drunk? Woman: What?
Sunday August 23,
2015
Tags technology, unemployment, replacement, obsolete, app, job, jobs, dating, logic, business, relationships
Transcript
Woman: ...and that's what I do for a living. What do you do? Dilbert: I'm building an app that will make your entire industry obsolete. I'm almost done. It looks pretty good. Woman: You're destroying my life! Dilbert: No, I'm only making the app. The app will be destroying your life. Woman: This got awkward, but I'm attracted to smart men, so... would you like to go out this weekend? Dilbert: I don't think that's a good idea. I can't get past your dead-end career.
Monday November 09,
2015
How Amazing The Weekend Was
Tags relationships, friendship, small talk, love, dating, frustration, obliviousness, conversation
Transcript
Boss: Do you want to hear how amazing my weekend was? Alice: No. Would you like to hear about the extended tragedy that is my social life? Boss: No. I went to the mountains. Alice: I fell in love with a dying polygamist.
Saturday February 13,
2016
Yoga For Posture
Tags yoga, posture, dating, attraction, Women, relationships
Transcript
Dilbert: I don't know what to do about my bad posture. Dogbert: Try yoga. Dilbert: Ooh, good idea. That will also improve my odds of meeting an attractive yoga-loving woman. Man: That was my plan too, but the full-stack guys gut here early and scared away the yoga women.


