Wear Whatever Comic Strips - Page 12
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Wally: I need your approval on the new safety manual. The Boss: "Gaaa!!! Sharp edges!! Gaaa!!! It grabbed my hand!!!" Wally: "Chapter One: Wear protective gloves and safety goggles at all times." The Boss: "Aaaiieee!!!"
"The prima donna" "Behold my indispensable greatness! No technical problem can thwart me!" "I wear no pants, as proof that I am above the rules. I am the alpha and the omega!" "Would you like to see a scoff, jeer, gibe, mock, sneer, fleer or flout?" "Fleer, I guess."
The boss: Dilbert, you'll absorb bills project when he transfers. Dont worry, He'll tell you everything you need to know. The whatchamacallit has to be whatever or else the who sits will go hey hey. Now this is either the budget total or a fax number. Its absolutely critical that you....um...I lost my train of thought. Dilbert: do you have a list of key contacts? That would have been a good idea. Dilbert: Can I call you if I have questions? You can try. I love my coworkers, until they talk.
"I save so much time by not shaving that Im considering giving up all forms of hygiene." "I'd phase into it by having a few unwashed telecommuting days per week." "And if you wear clown shoes, you never need to clip your toenails." "I should be writing this down."
"Sixty-percent of our distribution goes through Walgetco." "For all practical purposes, they now own us, except for the legal liabilities." "They'd like us to wear orange vests and bow toward their headquarters." "But no touching?"
Doctor: It's temporary blindness caused by your boss's flashes of the obvious. " doctor: Let Dogbert guide you for a few days. And here's a prescription to make you dopey." Dilbert: "Now?" Dogbert: "Whatever."
The Boss: This award goes to Asok for his hard work on ... Whatever. Asok: "My dedication has been rewarded! This is the happiest moment of my life!" "Wow! It's lucky that I got a new chair on the same day that mine was stolen."
Asok: "La-la-la-la-la... oops." "I inadvertently erased our entire customer database and all of the backups." "How can I explain this to our pointy-haired boss?" "Grab your laptop and follow me." "It's only a prototype. So whatever you do, don't touch anything." "GAAa!!! YOU ERASED THE CUSTOMER DATABASE!!" "ALL OF THE BACKUPS, TOO, YOU STUPID, STUPID #*@!*!" "I should've stopped before #*@!*!"
The Boss: "Our company will be relocating to a high-crime area for tax reasons." "Our CEO says don't worry about your safety because your limo can pull right into the underground parking garage." "Then he added, "Or chain your bicycle to a wino. Whatever."