Brave Enough Comic Strips - Page 12
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280 Results for Brave Enough
View 111 - 120 results for brave enough comic strips. Discover the best "Brave Enough" comics from Dilbert.com.
Tuesday May 20,
2008
Tags #not attracted, #long enough, #fix things, #tech support, #use abilities, #no action
Transcript
Tina: I'm not attracted to you, but I'd like to date you for one month. That should be long enough to resolve any tech support issues on my home computer, cell phone and home theater." Dilbert: Would there be any kissing? Tina: What kind of girl do you think I am?
Saturday April 05,
2008
Tags #represent boss, #imitate hair style, #mocking, #silly, #anger
Transcript
Alice: My boss sent me to represent him at this meeting. Fuh-fuh-fuh everything costs too much. Fuh-fuh-fuh we don't have enough resources! Ted: That doesn't help us. Alice: Hey, I'm not the one who invited him."
Monday March 31,
2008
Tags #coffee maker, #meeting, #not enough money, #raise, #too much, #budget, #business
Transcript
The boss: I'd like to give you a raise but I used the entire budget on a new coffee maker. It's a nice one.There's talk that I paid too much for you."
Tuesday March 25,
2008
Tags #hired archaeologist, #desk clutter, #copier reapirman, #used tools, #not fast, #found in clutter, #skull of men
Transcript
Carol, I hired famed archaeologist Dogbert to find the budget report in the clutter of your desk. Dogbert: This appears to be a copier repairman skull, possibly a ricoh or kyocera. I think he used tools. Carol: Not fast enough."
Sunday February 10,
2008
Tags #personality predictor, #judge career, #dead end job, #matches, #lack of potential, #sample question, #angry loner, #embezzler, #lazy, #label yourself
Transcript
The Boss: We'll be using the Dogbert personality predictor index to judge your career potential. Then we'll leave you in the dead end job that most closely matches your lack of potential. Here's a sample question... How would other people describe you? A)Angry loner B) embezzler C) lazy Dilbert: That's not enough choices! Dogbert: Says the angry loner. The Boss: You have thirty minutes to give yourself a label that will haunt you for the rest of your life. Wally: Would you say I'm more of an unidentified hominid or an inappropriate toucher?"
Sunday January 13,
2008
Tags #boss request, #help coworker, #own work, #projects, #projects suffer, #time management
Transcript
The Boss: Dilbert, I need you to help Ted on his project. Dilbert: If Ted's project succeeds, who will get the credit? The Boss: Ted will. It's his project. Dilbert: What if it fails? The Boss: That would be your fault for not helping him enough. Dilbert: If I spend my time helping Ted, my own projects will suffer. The only way this makes sense is if my projects are unimportant and so am I. The Boss: If it makes you feel any better, Ted and his projects are unimportant too.
Tuesday December 18,
2007
Tags #dead horse, #meeting room, #cahir, #beating, #good work, #havnet beaten long enough, #introduce
Transcript
The Boss: "I hired a dead horse, he doesn't look like much, but if you beat him long enough, he does good work." Dilbert: "Have you seen him do good work?" The Boss: "I haven't beaten him long enough." "Introduce yourself to the others!" Whap!
Saturday December 01,
2007
Tags #not enough recources, #project, #look lame, #fixed capacity, #dedicated higher priorities, #donated blood, #hurricane victims
Transcript
The boss: "Never tell anyone we don't have enough resources to do a project. It makes us look lame." "Instead, say we have a fixed capacity that is already dedicated to higher priorities. That makes whoever asked us for help look lame." Wally: "Can I keep telling people I donated all of my blood to hurricane victims?"
Sunday November 25,
2007
Tags #boss, #worker, #office, #wrong path, #precise verbal explanation, #embarrassment of undoing, #good plan, #progress, #mistreatment of workers, #corrupt policices, #bad boss
Transcript
The Boss: "Dilbert, I need you to do something, but I don't have time to fully explain it." "I'll give you just enough information to send you down the wrong path." "Later, after you do it wrong. I'll treat you like you're some sort of idiot." "Then I'll put you through the embarrassment of undoing everything you did." "This might not sound like a good plan to you." "But it takes the task off of my plate and puts it on yours." "That's called progress." Dilbert: "Today I helped make progress." Garbageman: "Better luck tomorrow."
Tuesday November 06,
2007
Tags #marginally useful things, #ageeing, #say it a certain way, #tone, #beat up, #ripped shirt, #anger, #repesct, #high strung, #co worker
Transcript
Alice: "You should check with Ted to see if he knows about this sort of thing." Dilbert: "I'll add that to my list of marginally useful things that other people have suggested I do." Dilbert: "Apparently, agreeing isn't enough. You also need to say it a certain way."