Complaining Comic Strips - Page 12

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113 Results for Complaining

View 111 - 113 results for complaining comic strips. Discover the best "Complaining" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags time sheet, increments, 15 minutes, meetings, shower time thinking, designing circuits, complaining

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Dilbert hands his timesheet to a secretary and says, "Here's my timesheet, filled out in increments of fifteen minutes." Dilbert says, "As usual, I coded the useless hours spent in meetings as 'work,' whereas the time I spent in the shower designing circuits in my mind as 'non-work.'" Dilbert continues, "Interestingly, even the time I spend complaining about my lack of productivity is considered 'work.'" The secretary thinks, "I hate my life."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags strategic planning team, satisfaction, vague emotional terms, mediocre thinkers, believe options, steer the company, viewgraphs, last years viewgraph

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Dilbert sits at his desk. The Boss says, "I'm putting you on the strategic planning team." The Boss continues, "It's like work but without the satisfaction of accomplishing anything." Dilbert and three co-workers sit at a conference table. A man says, "You're new, so let me explain how this works." The man continues, "We have meetings and talk about the company's strategy in vague emotional terms." The man continues, "In time, we convince ourselves that we're more than mediocre thinkers who sit around complaining." The man continues, "We start believing our opinions will steer the company. We feel important. We feel ALIVE!!" A woman tells Dilbert, "Then we snap out of it and make viewgraphs that say we should keep doing what we're doing." Dilbert says, "I like making viewgraphs." The woman replies, "Actually, we use last year's viewgraph."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags learning, mailman, observe

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Dogbert holds the telephone and yells, "Dogbert! The post office is complaining that you attacked a mail carrier." Dogbert replies, "Tell them that I love mail carriers and would NEVER try to hurt one." Dilbert says, "Apparently they object to the tranquilizer darts and homing transmitters." Dogbert asks, "But how else can we learn their migration patterns?"