Death To Boss Comic Strips - Page 12
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1000 Results for Death To Boss
View 111 - 120 results for death to boss comic strips. Discover the best "Death To Boss" comics from Dilbert.com.
Friday January 01,
2021
Cock Fights
Tags #business, #business ethics, #audit, #disturbing, #results, #sales, #department, #cockfight, #invitation, #rooster
Transcript
dogbert: my audit of your company has uncovered many disturbing things. for example, did you know that the sales department holds cockfights on the third floor every tuesday? boss: why have i never been invited? dogbert: you're not a rooster.
Tuesday December 29,
2020
Microwaving Fish
Tags #managers & supervisors, #microwave, #fish, #working from home, #smell, #rotting, #corpse, #cubicle
Transcript
boss on phone. boss: asok, you need to stop microwaving fish. i can't work with that smell in the air. asok on phone: i'm working from home. maybe you should check the cubicles for a rotting corpse. boss walking and thinking: maybe i'll let the janitor do that.
Monday December 28,
2020
Stapler Training
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #training, #planning, #meeting, #stapler, #safety, #mandatory, #fight
Transcript
boss: dilbert, what have you accomplished since our planning meeting? dilbert: the planning meeting was this morning. all i've done since then is take a mandatory training class on stapler safety. boss: but now you're fresh and ready for the fight? dilbert: only if it's a stapler fight.
Sunday December 27,
2020
Scheduling A Call
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #video conference call, #schedule, #call, #zoom, #facetime, #signal, #whatsapp, #voice call, #clock
Transcript
boss and dilbert communicating on video conference call. dilbert: let's schedule a follow-up call. do you prefer zoom, FaceTime, signal, WhatsApp, or voice call? boss: zoom dilbert: how about next tuesday at 10 a.m. my time, which is 1 p.m. your time? boss: i'll be on the road then, so you 10 a.m. will be my noon. but that's after the time change. boss: and i can't remember if i'm going to a place that change their clocks. dilbert: why don't we skip the whole thing because the call we are scheduling probably won't be any more useful than this one. boss: let us never speak of this again.
Friday December 25,
2020
Can't Tell When He Is Joking
Tags #business, #joking, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #employment, #moon lighting, #work, #video conference
Transcript
dilbert, boss and asok in front of laptop on video conference call. voice from laptop: excuse me. i have to take a call from one of the other employers who also believes i work for them full time from home. boss to dilbert: i can't tell when he's joking. dilbert: that's probably for the best.
Tuesday December 22,
2020
Ethics Class
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #continuing education, #class, #ethics, #organizations, #competitive, #industry, #disadvantage, #worry
Transcript
boss: you are all required to complete a class in ethics. dilbert: wouldn't that make us the only ethical organization in our industry and create a competitive disadvantage that leads to our demise? boss: stop your worrying. the class is required, but i'm not expecting any of it to stick.
Monday December 21,
2020
Tweets Do Not Represent Employer
Tags #business, #employment, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #tweet, #tweets, #object, #smart, #useful
Transcript
boss: i object to your twitter profile. it says... "my tweets are smart and useful, so obviously they do not represent my employer." Wally chocking on coffee: smorph! dilbert pointing: now see what you did to wally.
Sunday December 20,
2020
Wally Makes A Suggestion
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #product idea, #idea, #debunk
Transcript
wally: did you see my brilliant product idea i emailed to you? boss: yes, i already debunked it in my mind. wally: perhaps you could share your reasons. boss: if it's such a great idea. why isn't someone else doing it? and if someone is already doing it, we are far too late. in order for your idea to be good, i would have to think you are smarter than everyone in the industry. and seriously, just look at you. anyone else have an idea? others: nope. nope, never. nope.
Saturday December 19,
2020
Alice Is Honest
Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #technology, #goals, #quarter, #unrealistic, #honest
Transcript
boss: alice, you did not meet your goals this quarter. alice: that's because my goals are totally unrealistic and were created by a.moron. i hope you meant it when you said you want us to be honest with you. boss: i didn't expect you to act on it!
Friday December 18,
2020
Bad Attitude
Tags #business, #technology, #work, #exceptional, #complain, #attitude, #bad, #dislike, #sarcasm
Transcript
boss: your work has been exceptional, but people are complaining about your attitude. dilbert: aren't the people who are doing the complaining usually the ones with bad attitudes. boss: they think you dislike them. dilbert: i do, but i have a terrific attitude about it.