Say Bah Comic Strips - Page 12

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855 Results for Say Bah

View 111 - 120 results for say bah comic strips. Discover the best "Say Bah" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #time, #delay, #leaving, #schedule, #inconsiderate

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Woman: Can you take a look at the prototype? It keeps crashing. Dilbert: I was just leaving for the day. Woman: It will only take ten minutes. Dilbert: I came to work early so I could leave early and beat the traffic. Woman: No problem. It will only take ten minutes. Dilbert: It's never ten minutes! People always say it will be ten minutes, but it's never ten minutes! I give up! Where is it? Woman: Find it in the lab. I need to leave early to beat the traffic.

Management Fast Track

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Management Fast Track - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #talent, #management, #potential, #frustration

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Boss: Dilbert, our CEO asked me to put you on the management fast track. Dilbert: Why does he hate me so much? Boss: He didn't say, but I have a lot of guesses if you want to hear them.

Boss Tweets Racist Stuff

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Boss Tweets Racist Stuff - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #cell phone, #conversation, #desk, #sitting, #technology

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You retweeted a racist conspiracy theory. I did? I checked snopes.com, and they say it is not true that Elbonians evolved from pandas less than a hundred years ago. You might want to delete the tweet. nah. What's the worst that can happen?

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #conversation, #analogy, #false equivalence, #frustration

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Narrator: The bad analogy guy. Dilbert: And that's why I want to rewrite that part of the software. Man: That's like closing the barn door after the horse gets out. Dilbert: No, it isn't anything like that. I just think the current software could bet better. Man: So it's like throwing away the baby with the bathwater. Dilbert: No, it is not like that even a little! Man: You sound exactly like Hitler. That can't be a coincidence. Dilbert: Nothing you say makes sense! Man: That's like saying the earth is flat.

Wally's Red File Gets Him Out Of Work

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Wally's Red File Gets Him Out Of Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #laziness, #ruse, #work ethic, #deception, #excuse

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Wally: I'd love to help you, but I'm busy working on the red file. Woman: Is the red file a real thing or just a thing you say to get out of work? Wally: It's all the same on your end.

Rather Eat Garbage

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Rather Eat Garbage - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #choosing, #choices, #boredom, #listening, #trash, #garbage, #suffering

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Wally: Would you rather eat garbage or listen to our boss talk about his weekend? Dilbert: I'd have to know more about the garbage to make that decision. Wally: Let's say it's mostly kitchen stuff. Dilbert: Am I eating it from the can or fighting birds for it?

Ted Is Doing A Terrible Job

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Ted Is Doing A Terrible Job - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #talking, #conversation, #boring, #annoy, #quitting, #boredom

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Boss: Ted is doing a terrible job. Catbert: Maybe you should talk to him. Boss: What should I say? Catbert: It doesn't matter. Five minutes of listening to you will make him want to quit. Boss: That's crazy enough to work. Catbert: You've only been here for two minutes and my tail is asleep.

Texting The Boss

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Texting The Boss - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #texting, #driving, #distraction, #trick, #murder, #killing, #malice

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Carol: Hold on, I have to text my boss while he's driving. I'll say it's a crisis so he has to text back. Dilbert: Is it legal to kill him that way? Carol: Yes, I checked with a lawyer first.

Turn Down Service

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Turn Down Service - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #pun, #wordplay, #hotel, #turn-down

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Dilbert: I'd like to decline your turn-down service tonight so I can have some privacy. Voice: We're going to do it anyway. Good luck finding your stuff after we randomly move it. Dilbert: What? You can't do that! I hereby turn down your turn down of your turn-down service! Voice: Say goodbye to your phone charger!

Offending The Janitor

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Offending The Janitor - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #politically correct, #offensive, #language, #misunderstanding

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Boss: Ted, I have to fire you because you said something that offended the janitor. Ted: What did I say?! Boss: I don't know. The janitor has a thick accent and he's terrible at charades. Elbonian 1: Did you take care of the buy who keeps putting banana peels in the recycling? Elbonian 2: He won't do it again.