Date Cyborgs Comic Strips - Page 12

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View 111 - 120 results for date cyborgs comic strips. Discover the best "Date Cyborgs" comics from Dilbert.com.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #self-centered, #jerks, #woman, #dating, #date, #different, #considerate, #ugly

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Dilbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "Most handsome men are self-centered jerks." The woman continues, "But you're different . . . You're . . ." Dilbert asks, "Considerate?" The woman replies, "Ugly."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #business, #Card, #romance, #interpreter, #dates, #translate, #male, #female, #language, #date, #women and men

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "Here's my new business card. I'm a romance interpreter." Dogbert explains, "For a small fee I'll accompany you on dates and translate between male and female language." Dilbert, Dogbert and a woman sit at a table in a restaurant. The woman says, "Blah blah blah." Dogbert translates, "She's telling a pointless story about work. By annoying you in this way she hopes to form a closer bond."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #class, #career, #social, #life, #engineer, #bonanza, #ladies, #field, #video games, #devices, #non-engineer

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Dilbert stands in front of a classroom of children saying, "And don't forget the social life that comes with being an engineer." Dilbert continues, "Ninety percent of all engineers are guys, so it's a bonanza of dating opportunities for the ladies who enter the field." Dilbert continues, "For the men, there are these little video game devices . . ." A little girl raises her hand and asks, "Would I be allowed to date a non-engineer?"

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #date, #men and women, #dating, #twins, #telepath, #normal, #thoughts, #guy

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Dilbert sits at a table in a restaurant with a two-headed woman. Dilbert says, "Believe it or not, this is the first time I've ever dated a two-headed telepath." The women look frightened. Dilbert says, "You might pick up a strange thought or two, but believe me, these are normal thoughts for a guy . . ." Dilbert says, "Well, maybe not that last one . . ." The woman grabs the tablecloth and looks shocked.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #the boss, #alice, #business meeting

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The Boss, Dilbert, Alice and another employee sit at a conference table. The Boss says, "Does anybody have any questions about our plan? Ask me anything - there are no 'stupid' questions." A man asks, "If you crossed the international date line on your birthday, would you still get presents?" The Boss thinks, "Oh great . . . There ARE stupid questions and I don't know the answers."

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ted, #Dilbert, #job offer, #office

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Dilbert sits at his desk. A man asks, "Have I told you recently that I have a lucrative job offer from our competitor?" Dilbert replies, "Yes." The man continues, "The pay is obscene, they wear casual clothes at work, and Wednesday through Friday is free beer and pizza." The man continues, "As the new guy I get to date the masseuse until the company matches me with an attractive co-worker." Dilbert covers his eyes and sobs.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dilbert date, #asks lunch date, #cheryl, #full of lunch, #rejection, #next week, #turned down, #lame excuse, #office, #co worker

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Dilbert: Hi Cheryl. would you like to have lunch with me next week? Cheryl: I..uh...already ate lunch. Im not hungry. Dilbert: Im talking about next week!! Cheryl: I don't think I can have another bite, all full.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #lunch date, #rejction, #says she's dead, #seeing an illusion

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Tina: Lunch? With you? I'd love to but...uh... Tina: Im clinically dead, what you see are merely the last involuntary spasms before I stiffen. Dilbert: I have a hand truck. Tina: this was a very bad idea.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #date, #lisa, #coffee at work, #wash hair, #saturday night, #dinner date, #rejected, #clean hair

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Dilbert: Lisa, I was wondering if you'd like to go to dinner saturday night. Lisa: Uh...I have to wash my hair saturday. how about having coffee here at work instead? Dilbert: I'll pass. I was hoping for someone with clean hair.

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- Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bad luck, #lottery tickets, #fabulous wealth, #delight, #hedonistic, #yesterdays date, #old, #expired, #scam, #scammer, #cheater, #rat, #dog, #animals

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"Value priced lottery tickets" Ratbert: "I am drawn by the allure of fabulous wealth and a life of hedonistic delight...one please." "This is dated yesterday." Dogbert: "Ooh, bad luck. Try again?"