Inferior Technology Comic Strips - Page 12

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806 Results for Inferior Technology

View 111 - 120 results for inferior technology comic strips. Discover the best "Inferior Technology" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags thinking, technology problem, executive attention netowrk, social awareness, radical change, sarcasm

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Dilbert: I have to warn you that I'll be going deep on a technology problem today. I'll be using the executive attention network of my brain at the expense of my social awareness. Boss: Sounds like a radical change. Dilbert: I can't tell if that was sarcasm.

Sounded Interesting From Across The Room

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Sounded Interesting From Across The Room - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags conversation, smartphone technology, speed evolve, meta organism, sum of parts, looked interetsing, employees, coffee break, cups, business

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Tina: What are you talking about? It sounds interesting. Dilbert: We were saying that our smartphone technology has caused us to speed-evolve into a meta-organism that is the sum of our connected parts. Tina: In my defense, from across the room it looked interesting.

Marketing Is Only Legal Because It Doesn't Work

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Marketing Is Only Legal Because It Doesn't Work - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags etiquette & ethics, marketing, robot, robotics, slave, technology, emotionally manipulate, marketing leagl, enslave humans, business

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Coworker: Sales are up 900% since we programmed our robots to emotionally manipulate their owners into buying upgrades. Dilbert: Um, you do know marketing is only legal because it doesn't work most of the time, right? Coworker; Nope. I do not know that. Shiny! Dilbert: We invented a technology to enslave homo sapiens?

Dilbert Fixes Boss's Technology Strategy

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Dilbert Fixes Boss's Technology Strategy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags verbiage, technical, jargon, deception, logic, team player, babble

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Dilbert: fixed your technology strategy. I couldn't make it sound logical, so I buried the stupid parts under seven layers of technical babble. Add an irrelevant graph and no one will be the wiser... literally. Boss: Please stop being a team player.

Brain Scan And 3 D Scanner

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Brain Scan And 3 D Scanner - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags replication, technology, clone, playing god, doppelganger

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Dilbert: My invention can scan the human brain and duplicate it in software. I combined that technology with a 3-D printer that makes human body parts. Boss: What does it all do? Replicant: He's getting to the good part.

Nano Robots Are The New Health Plan

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Nano Robots Are The New Health Plan - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, robots, invention, health, big business, corporation, nanobot

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CEO: We're replacing the employee health plan with nanorobot technology. We'll insert tiny medical robots into their lower digestive tracts to keep them healthy forever. Boss: So, our plan is to shove robots up... CEO: Only until the robots can replace them.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags technology, coding, code, control, efficiency, purpose, job, red tape, business

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Mordac: Step away from that open source code! Dilbert: Why? Mordac: Because I am Mordac, The Preventer of All Efficient Solutions in the Information Technology Realm. Dilbert: That isn't an actual job. Mordac: I was hoping it was. I lost the file with my job description. That was five years ago. I've been winging it since then. My parents taught me that I could be anything I wanted to be. And I wanted to be this. So don't use that code! Dilbert: Not even when you turn around?

Wally's Stealth Drone

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Wally's Stealth Drone - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags deception, deceit, drone, technology, invention, fake

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Wally: In my right hand is a standard drone. In my left hand is a drone using the cloaking technology I invented. Voices: Ooh! Wow! Wally: I'll demonstrate it flying as soon as I finish the noise cancellation. CEO: Employee of the year!

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags Wally, the boss, bad, technology, day, phone, freezing, printer, working, network, warning, lights, christmas, tree, laptop, boot, coincidence, permission, lock, lead-line, box, hero

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Wally: I'm having a bad technology day. My phone keeps freezing, my printer isn't working, and our network is down. Wally: My car's warning lights look like a Christmas tree, and my laptop won't boot up. Maybe its all just coincidence but I don't think we can take that chance. May I have permission to lock myself in a lead-lined box to protect the rest of the company? The Boss: How will I know you're really in a lead-lined box? Wally: YOu'll know because your phone will be working fine. The Boss: My phone is still working that man is a hero.

Contacting The Alien Probe

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Contacting The Alien Probe - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags aliens, communication, earth, space, technology

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Dilbert: We're ready to fire up our laser communication technology to contact the alien probe heading to Earth. Boss: Is the alien probe unmanned? Dilbert: It is now.