Interview Comic Strips - Page 12
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125 Results for Interview
View 111 - 120 results for interview comic strips. Discover the best "Interview" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday January 17,
2015
Fierce Employees Wanted
Tags anger, confusion, ferocity, fierce, hiring, interview, job application, job interview
Transcript
Boss: We're looking for employees who are fierce! Applicant: Should I punch you or something? I don't know how to play this. Boss: Try acting normal, but angrier.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Tuesday March 31,
2015
Tina Strings Economic Words Together
Tags economist, economy, deception, jargon, prediction, stock market, recession, money
Transcript
Wally The Chief Economist. Tina: My interview with you is live on the website. Nothing you said made sense, so I strung together a bunch of economic jargon and called it your forecast. One Month Later. Computer: Only one economist accurately predicted when this bubble would burst. Dilbert: Uh-oh.
Monday April 06,
2015
App For Hiring Decisions
Tags mansplaining, tech, programmers, coders, interview, hiring, stereotype
Transcript
Boss: No need to talk. Now we use an app to make hiring decisions. The app checked your online footprint and says you're a serial mansplainer with an unsuccessful dating history. I assume that means you have awesome technical skills. Interviewee: Full stack!
Tuesday May 26,
2015
Ten Things We Look For In Employees
Tags hiring, qualifications, interview, job interview, outsmart
Transcript
Boss: We look for ten qualities when we hire. Man: Ten? I'm looking for an employer who knows how to set priorities. Boss: He was too good for us.
Wednesday September 09,
2015
Ceo Gets Paid More For Creating Nothing
Tags small talk, conversation, criticism, executives, salary, wages, fairness, offense, offend, money
Transcript
Dilbert: Do you ever think it's weird that you get paid a hundred times more than me? I invented our core technology. All you did was interview better than a few other people who didn't invent anything. I'm not good at small talk. CEO: I would totally fire you if I could invent things.
Monday October 12,
2015
Asok Asks How Much Is Luck
Tags nepotism, luck, success, obliviousness, rich people, privilege
Transcript
Asok: May I ask some questions about your journey to success? Boss: I don't like the sound of this. Asok: I am trying to ascertain what percentage of a person's success is pure luck. For example, who hired you for your first real job? Boss: My dad. But in my defense, I interview well.
Thursday March 31,
2016
What The Family Would Think
Tags work ethic, interview, lying, deception, commitment, honesty, guest artist, donna oatney
Transcript
Man: If you hire me, I will dedicate 100 percent of my energy to making this company succeed! Dilbert: What would your family think if they heard that? Man: They'd understand. They're all huge liars, too.
Thursday May 26,
2016
Wally Gets Referral Money
Tags bonus, con, deception, hiring, money, referral, scheme, guest artist, jake tapper
Transcript
Wally: Stop! Why are you here? Man: I have an interview for a job as an engineer. Wally: My name is Wally. Tell Human Resources I referred you ad I'll get a $1,000 bonus. Boss: Have you noticed that all of our new hires were referred by the same person? Catbert: Sounds like we found our Employee Of The Year!
Sunday March 11,
2018
Tags interview, hiring, honesty, immoral, ulterior motives
Transcript
Dilbert: What would you say are your biggest weaknesses? Man: I like to rifle through my coworkers' desks when they aren't looking. But I don't steal anything unless I know I can frame someone else for the crime. I leave for work an hour late every day and blame traffic. I avoid accomplishing goals so I won't feel like sellout. Sometimes I'll start a trash fire just to get out of a meeting. And I've gotten every one of my bosses fired for things they didn't say or do. Boss: Would he be a good fit? Dilbert: I like what he has to offer.
Thursday May 24,
2018
Boring And Needy Children
Tags parents, mother, interview, children, annoyance, work-life balance, Family
Transcript
Boss: Do you enjoy spending time with your children? Woman: No, they're boring and needy. They can't even hold a conversation. If I'm being honest, I prefer working long hours so I see less of them. Boss: Perfect. You're hired. Woman: I mean, I love them, but I don't like them.


