Social Situation Comic Strips - Page 12

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254 Results for Social Situation

View 111 - 120 results for social situation comic strips. Discover the best "Social Situation" comics from Dilbert.com.

Wally's Restroom Time

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Wally's Restroom Time - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #covid-19, #managers & supervisors, #responsibility, #employee, #tracker, #men's room, #social distancing, #business, #face mask

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boss: according to my employee tracker, you spent 45 minutes in stall four of the men's room today. wally: i thought you said the purpose of tracking us was to ensure social distancing. boss: i think you have to accept some responsibility for believing it.

No Performance Reviews

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No Performance Reviews  - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #employment, #managers & supervisors, #sarcasm, #technology, #Political, #social, #opinions, #ranking, #acceptable

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boss in staff meeting: the company will no longer do performance reviews. from now on, you will be ranked on the acceptability of your political and social opinions. dilbert: do you have a list of acceptable opinions? boss: there will be no hints.

Online Therapy

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Online Therapy - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #psychiatry, #technology, #online, #therapy, #video therapy, #social, #isolation, #awkward, #bored, #people, #hate, #pretend, #hand washing, #carrier, #deadly, #pathogen, #normal

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dilbert on video call. voice from laptop: billing for your video therapy session begins now. dilbert: i'm worried that all of my recent social isolation has changed me. therapist: how so? dilbert: well, a year ago, i felt awkward and bored around people, and that was bad enough. now i hate them so much that i only pretend to wash my hands. i guess i'm secretly hoping i'm a carrier for a deadly pathogen of some type. am i normal? therapist: i sure hope so because i do the same thing.

Dick The Nemesis

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Dick The Nemesis - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #hire, #nemesis, #social media, #bad, #idea, #doubt, #science, #workplace

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boss: i hired dick to be your workplace nemesis. you might know his work from social media. dilbert: this feels like a bad idea. dick: doubt science much? duhrr.

Make Us Look Good

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Make Us Look Good - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #managers & supervisors, #press release, #company, #support, #social, #issues, #complaining, #awesome, #research, #appearances

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ceo: write a press release saying our company supports whatever social issues people are griping about lately. tina: does it matter which issues i pick? ceo: nah. just make us look awesome. tina: should i research the issues first? ceo: are you trying to not get the point?

Dilbert Makes A Friend

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Dilbert Makes A Friend - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #business, #office, #work, #news, #friend, #social media, #monster, #check, #fooled, #posts

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dilbert and dogbert at home. dilbert: good news. i made a friend at work. dogbert: have you checked his social media posts? dilbert yelling: he's a monster! dogbert: that's why we check.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #newspapers, #wages, #managers & supervisors, #business, #money

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Alice says, "I just saw in the news that Google gave an engineer millions of dollars. I'm underpaid!" The Boss says, "I'll speak to our director of human resources and see how I can fix this situation." Alice says, "Really?" The Boss says, "How can we stop news?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #despair, #meetings, #six variables, #4 imbeciles, #brilliant engineer, #complexity algorithm, #rational deciosn, #brilliant career

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Dilbert: Okay, this next decision involves six variables, four imbeciles, and one brilliant engineer. According to the Dogbert complexity algorithm, it is impossible to make a rational decision in this situation. All in favor of giving up? Boss: I found out I'm a brilliant engineer.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #internet & world wide web, #dating site, #social media, #propsects, #addicted, #facebook, #pain meds, #prescription pain meds, #eye contact, #relationships, #technology

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Dilbert: I've got two good prospects on this dating site. One is addicted to Facebook and the other is addicted to prescription pain meds. Dogbert: Sort of a tie. Dilbert: But only one of them is likely to make eye contact.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #dating, #confident men, #phonies, #interest, #Opinion, #relationships

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Woman: I like men who are confident in any situation. Dilbert: Within that subset of men, do you prefer the phonies or the ones who are too dumb to know when they shouldn't be confident? Dogbert: What went wrong this time? Dilbert: I showed interest in her opinion.