Technology Comic Strips - Page 12
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803 Results for Technology
View 111 - 120 results for technology comic strips. Discover the best "Technology" comics from Dilbert.com.
Saturday February 07,
2015
Marketing Is Only Legal Because It Doesn't Work
Tags etiquette & ethics, marketing, robot, robotics, slave, technology, emotionally manipulate, marketing leagl, enslave humans, business
Transcript
Coworker: Sales are up 900% since we programmed our robots to emotionally manipulate their owners into buying upgrades. Dilbert: Um, you do know marketing is only legal because it doesn't work most of the time, right? Coworker; Nope. I do not know that. Shiny! Dilbert: We invented a technology to enslave homo sapiens?
Top Dilbert Searches
marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Saturday May 09,
2015
Dilbert Fixes Boss's Technology Strategy
Tags verbiage, technical, jargon, deception, logic, team player, babble
Transcript
Dilbert: fixed your technology strategy. I couldn't make it sound logical, so I buried the stupid parts under seven layers of technical babble. Add an irrelevant graph and no one will be the wiser... literally. Boss: Please stop being a team player.
Thursday May 21,
2015
Brain Scan And 3 D Scanner
Tags replication, technology, clone, playing god, doppelganger
Transcript
Dilbert: My invention can scan the human brain and duplicate it in software. I combined that technology with a 3-D printer that makes human body parts. Boss: What does it all do? Replicant: He's getting to the good part.
Thursday August 27,
2015
Nano Robots Are The New Health Plan
Tags technology, robots, invention, health, big business, corporation, nanobot
Transcript
CEO: We're replacing the employee health plan with nanorobot technology. We'll insert tiny medical robots into their lower digestive tracts to keep them healthy forever. Boss: So, our plan is to shove robots up... CEO: Only until the robots can replace them.
Sunday March 20,
2016
Tags technology, coding, code, control, efficiency, purpose, job, red tape, business
Transcript
Mordac: Step away from that open source code! Dilbert: Why? Mordac: Because I am Mordac, The Preventer of All Efficient Solutions in the Information Technology Realm. Dilbert: That isn't an actual job. Mordac: I was hoping it was. I lost the file with my job description. That was five years ago. I've been winging it since then. My parents taught me that I could be anything I wanted to be. And I wanted to be this. So don't use that code! Dilbert: Not even when you turn around?
Saturday June 09,
2018
Wally's Stealth Drone
Tags deception, deceit, drone, technology, invention, fake
Transcript
Wally: In my right hand is a standard drone. In my left hand is a drone using the cloaking technology I invented. Voices: Ooh! Wow! Wally: I'll demonstrate it flying as soon as I finish the noise cancellation. CEO: Employee of the year!
Sunday September 23,
2018
Tags Wally, the boss, bad, technology, day, phone, freezing, printer, working, network, warning, lights, christmas, tree, laptop, boot, coincidence, permission, lock, lead-line, box, hero
Transcript
Wally: I'm having a bad technology day. My phone keeps freezing, my printer isn't working, and our network is down. Wally: My car's warning lights look like a Christmas tree, and my laptop won't boot up. Maybe its all just coincidence but I don't think we can take that chance. May I have permission to lock myself in a lead-lined box to protect the rest of the company? The Boss: How will I know you're really in a lead-lined box? Wally: YOu'll know because your phone will be working fine. The Boss: My phone is still working that man is a hero.
Friday December 21,
2018
Contacting The Alien Probe
Tags aliens, communication, earth, space, technology
Transcript
Dilbert: We're ready to fire up our laser communication technology to contact the alien probe heading to Earth. Boss: Is the alien probe unmanned? Dilbert: It is now.
Friday March 22,
2019
Sean From Extreme Marketing
Tags extreme, marketing, sean, brainwashing, technology, unapprove, first
Transcript
Boss: This is Sean from the extreme marketing department. He's here to tell us about our new brainwashing technology. Dilbert: I don't approve of brainwashing. Sean: That's why I'm going to do you first.
Saturday March 23,
2019
Brainwashing To Increase Sales
Tags questioning, brainwashing, technology, increase, ethnical
Transcript
Sean: Our brainwashing technology had boosted sales by 900% Dilbert: But is it ethnical? Sean: Yes, it is. Yes...It...Is

