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View 111 - 120 results for tired of pretty boys comic strips. Discover the best "Tired Of Pretty Boys" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 02, 2010's comic on:


Tags #work from home, #bathrobe, #distractions, #challenge, #determined, #gas leak, #sparks, #baby in wall, #ears up, #frustrated, #yell, #mouth open

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Dilbert says, "I'm working at home today so I can concentrate without any distractions." Dilbert says, "Please don't disturb me. Nothing is so important that it can't wait." Dogbert says, "I take that as a challenge." Dilbert says, "No, please..." Dogbert says, "Do you smell that?" Dogbert says, "I'm pretty sure it's a gas leak." Dogbert says, "Have you noticed that the lamp makes huge sparks every once in a while?" Dogbert says, "I wouldn't worry. What's the worst thing that could happen?" Dogbert says, "I think I hear a baby trapped in the wall!" Dilbert says, "Get out of my head!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 09, 2010's comic on:


Tags #lunch date, #happy, #pump fists, #annoyed, #inconvenient, #two musketeers, #face forward, #plan ruined

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Dilbert says, "Amber, would you like to go to lunch with me?" Amber says, "Sure!" Dilbert thinks, "Yes!!! I'm in!" Amber says, "Do you mind if we bring Bob? I need to talk to him about his project." Dilbert says, "Well, that would be?" Amber says, "Hey, Bob. Meet us in the lobby." Amber says, "Look at us! We're like the two Musketeers, plus Dilbert." Dilbert says, "There were three musketeers." Amber says, "I'm pretty sure there were two." Amber says, "Wait... I just remembered I have a conference call at noon. You two go ahead without me." Bob says, "We're like the one musketeer." Dilbert says, "Just eat."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 09, 2007's comic on:


Tags #converstaion, #need to be right, #annoying, #pointed out, #date, #blame

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You treat every conversation like it's a contest where you have to be the one who is right! Dilbert: "It only seems that way because everything you say is wrong." "See? There it is!" Dilbert: "I'm pretty sure that was you again."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 30, 2004's comic on:


Tags #tight budget, #colorful paper clips, #incoming email, #paid per hour, #watch, #meeting, #berate employee, #business

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"Yesterday, someone in this room gave me a document with a yellow paper clip." "I know that multicolored paper clips look 'pretty.'" "But I remind you that we are on a tight budget!" "We can't be throwing away all our money on colorful paper clips." "Do I make myself clear?!!" "I salvaged that paper clip from incoming mail." "Now excuse me while I stare at my watch and wonder how much you're paid per hour." "I'm sure you've done inefficient things that I don't know about." "Two minutes is... $5."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share November 02, 2003's comic on:


Tags #focusing on bandwidth, #organic growth, #table an issue, #sudebar, #managing expectations, #ducks in a row, #no project

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The Boss: "Wally, what's the status of your project?" Wally: "Deep breath.. clear my mind..." "I've been focusing my bandwidth on organic growth." "I'm getting lots of push-back, so I'm taking the discussions offline." "But sometimes I table an issue or handle it in a side bar." "Now I have my ducks in a row. The deal-breakers are on the back burner, and I'm managing expectations." The Boss: "Okay... keep up the good work." Dilbert: "Wally, you don't have a project." "What? Then why am I so tired?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share August 25, 2002's comic on:


Tags #make box bluer, #micromanaging, #blood smaple, #microscope, #manage cellular level, #erwin schrodinger, #quantum level, #free gifts, #white blood cells, #say hi

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Alice is sitting at her computer. The Boss approaches and says, "Make the box bluer." The Boss continues, "A little more.. A little more... A little more.." Alice interrupts, "That's it!!" Alice opens her drawer and exclaims, "When you get tired of micromanaging me..." Alice hands The Boss a cup of blood and continues, "Put this sample of my blood under a microscope so you can manage me on a cellular level." Alice continues yelling, "And here's a book by Erwin Schrodinger in case you'd like to manage me on a quantum level!" Alice screams, "Do you understand what I'm saying?" The Boss walks out carrying the blood sample and book. He thinks, "Free gifts." The Boss sits at his desk and says to the blood sample, "Now I want all of you white blood cells to spell 'Hi.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share October 06, 2002's comic on:


Tags #compost, #coot, #landscaping, #leadership skills, #listening, #long term potential, #performance review, #rating is feral, #squirrely, #thesaurus, #words, #ratings, #new words

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Wally is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches and says, "Wally, it's time for your annual performance review." As they're walking to the conference room, The Boss says to Wally, "None of my usual words fit your situation." They enter the conference room and take seats. The Boss continues, "So I had to hit the thesaurus pretty hard." The Boss continues, "Your overall rating is 'feral.'" The Boss continues, "Your leadership skills are rated 'squirrely.'" The Boss continues, "And your teamwork is a solid 'coot.'" The Boss continues, "Your long-term potential is to die in the landscaping and become compost." After the meeting, Dilbert asks Wally, "How'd it go?" Wally responds, "I wasn't really listening."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share May 03, 2013's comic on:


Tags #children, #ignorance (knowledge), #replaced by robot, #replaced by hammer, #ugly, #furniture, #Family

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Carol: My 12-year-old wants to know what career would prevent him from being replaced by a robot. Dilbert: I've met your son, and I'm pretty sure he could be replaced by a hammer. Carol: This took an ugly turn. Dilbert: Maybe the robots can use him as furniture.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share September 08, 2013's comic on:


Tags #death & dying, #negotiating, #work ethic, #raise, #workload, #incentive, #work harder, #disgruntled, #no meaning, #dreams lie broken

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Boss: If you finish your project in twelve months, I'll give you a five percent raise. Dilbert: I would gladly give up five percent of my future pay to avoid a doubling of my workload. Boss: You don't understand. I'm giving you an incentive to work harder. Dilbert: No, I'm pretty sure you're charging me five percent of my future pay to sit here and feel disgruntled. And it's working. I hate you more than ever and I no longer find meaning in my work My dreams lie broken and empty beneath the ruins of my optimism. Boss: I can't tell if your negotiating or dying. Dilbert: It's a little of both.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Share December 03, 2013's comic on:


Tags #frustration, #money, #takes money, #makes money

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Boss: IT takes money to make money. Dilbert: Where did the first money come from? Wally: I'm pretty sure it takes money to waste money, too Boss: Please stop talking!