Want Hardware Comic Strips - Page 12

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View 111 - 120 results for want hardware comic strips. Discover the best "Want Hardware" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #secret, #ratbert, #dog, #rat, #elf, #gang, #disguise, #infiltrate, #hand shake, #heckuva, #guess

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Dogbert says, "Ratbert, I want you to wear a disguise and infiltrate the elf gang that has been bothering us." Ratbert replies, "Check." An elf says to Ratbert who is wearing an elf hat and clothing, "We haven't seen you before . . . " Another elf asks, "What's the secret handshake?" Ratbert bends over and waves his arms. The elf says, "No, but that's one heckuva good guess."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #ratbert, #snack, #apple, #rat, #worst, #part, #eat

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Dilbert sits at his desk. Ratbert enters carrying an apple and says, "Snack time, Dilbert! I brought you an apple so you will like me!" Dilbert says, "Nice try, Ratbert, but I don't want to eat something that was touched by a rat." Ratbert says sadly, "The worst part is that's why I didn't eat it myself."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #pants, #clothes, #dresser, #bad, #robot, #wrong, #underpants, #drapes

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A robot enters wearing overalls and says to Dilbert, "I made some pants out of the clothes in your dresser." Dilbert shakes his finger and says, "Bad robot!! I want you to tell me why what you did was wrong." The robot pulls his underwear out of his pants and says, "It's not wrong. I remembered to make underpants out of the drapes."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #president, #united states, #charisma, #unify, #divided, #Political, #party, #democrat, #communist

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Dilbert sits in his chair and Dogbert stands on the hassock. Dogbert says, "I've decided to run for President of the United States." Dogbert continues, "I'm hoping my charisma will unify a divided political party." Dilbert asks, "You're running as a Democrat?" Dogbert replies, "No, Communist. I want to have a chance."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dogbert, #garbageman, #home, #specific, #except, #campaign

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The garbage man says to Dogbert, "The key to winning the election is voter turnout." The garbage man continues, "To be specific, you want everybody to stay home except you." The garbage man holds up a poster and says, "I've worked up a little ad campaign." The poster has a picture of a man with his tongue hanging out of his mouth. The poster says, "He touched the voting booth before you did and he never washes his hands."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #working, #designing, #line, #cards, #death, #occasions, #funeral, #dead, #sentimental

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Dogbert sits at the table writing on some cards. Dilbert asks, "What are you working on?" Dogbert replies, "I'm designing a line of cards for death occasions." Dogbert continues, "You know how sometimes you can't make it to the funeral, so you want to send a card instead . . ." Dilbert reads, "I'm sorry you're dead." Dogbert asks, "Is it too sentimental?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #ratbert, #bob, #dinosaur, #meaningless, #existence, #ironically, #ruined, #life

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Ratbert says to Bob the Dinosaur, "Bob, sometimes I wonder if there's a place in this world for a sensitive rat like me." Ratbert continues, "I can't live the hollow, meaningless shell of existence that others so ironically call 'life.'" Ratbert concludes, "I want to make a difference to people." Bob says, "Well, you ruined MY day."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #friendship, #strategy, #Dogbert, #financial, #advisor, #live, #lifelong, #bond, #trust, #money, #churn

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Dogbert answers the door and a man in a suit says, "Hi! I want to be your financial advisor." The man continues, "I've come to live with you. We'll eventually form a lifelong bond of trust and friendship." Dogbert says angrily, "I liked better when you guys just took our money." The man says, "I recommend a strategy called 'Churn.'"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #Dilbert, #Dogbert, #stock market, #fortune, #work, #member, #society, #workplace, #satisfying, #gloat

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Dilbert says to Dogbert, "I'm going to work like a regular guy even though I just made a fortune in the stock market." Dilbert continues, "That's because I still want to be a useful and contributing member of society." Dilbert continues, "And of course, the workplace is the second most satisfying place to gloat." Dogbert asks, "Are you done here yet?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #movie, #office, #tv, #Wally, #Dilbert, #sofa, #alice, #mary, #soap

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Dilbert sits at his desk. A woman outside the cubicle says, "Alice, Mary, let's go to the ladies room!" The woman holds up a videotape and says, "I rented 'Gone With the Wind.' We can watch it on the big screen tv." Another woman says, "I want the grey sofa!" Wally enters Dilbert's cubicle and says, "Hey, look! The men's room has SOAP!!"