Card Board Comic Strips - Page 13

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164 Results for Card Board

View 121 - 130 results for card board comic strips. Discover the best "Card Board" comics from Dilbert.com.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #bridery, #boss, #bribery dvd, #prepping, #money, #offer, #sly, #meeting, #drinks, #top secret, #business

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"If you recommend my company's product to your board, there might be a little something for you later." "Before you decide, look at this DVD titled, 'Is bribery right for you?'" "The narrator might refer to you by name when she dances."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #take six months, #time line, #leadership, #made me unmotivated, #foreseen or unforseen, #wally is dysfunctional, #schedule is random, #looks mad

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The Boss points to a board that says, "Time Line." He says, "The project will take six months..." He continues, "Unless there are unforeseen problems." Dilbert raises his hand and says, "Question." Dilbert says to the Boss, "Your leadership has made me unmotivated." Dilbert asks, "Is that considered foreseen or unforeseen?" Dilbert continues, pointing at Wally, "And Wally is dysfunctional on many levels." Wally agrees, "I really am." Dilbert asks, "Was that foreseen? Or are you saying the schedule is random?" Dilbert turns to Alice and says, "He looks mad." Alice says, "I didn't see that coming."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #relocatating, #better cubicle, #team of movers, #boxed possessions, #undisclosed location, #laminate company id

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Asok is packing boxes. He tells Dilbert, "I'm relocating to a better cubicle." Asok continues, "Tonight a team of movers will take my boxed possessions to an undisclosed location." Asok continues, "They're also going to laminate my company I.D." Asok continues, "I'm supposed to leave it with the guard on the way out." Asok holds up a check and says, "And I got paid two days early!" Asok continues, "It's all because management appreciated the constructive criticism I posted on the message board." Asok folds his arms proudly and says, "As I hoped, my condescending tone helped them to see their folly." Dilbert asks, "Do you mind if I rifle through your boxes and take office supplies?"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #phishing, #new hobby, #fake banking emails, #gullible executives, #financial information, #steal, #password social security card

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"I have a new hobby. It's called phishing." "I send fake banking e-mails to gullible executives. Then I find out their financial information and use it to steal the money they don't deserve." Dear Customer, This is your bank. We forgot your social security number and password. Why don't you send them to us so we can protect your money. Sincerely, I. B. Banker "Looks legit."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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The product review board approved your business case for the government mandate. "Diversity is very important to this company." "What do you think 'government mandate' means?" "I've seen the way the mailman looks at me."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Executive Compensation Review Board "How much should we pay our CEO if he just shows up for work?" "FIFTY MILLION DOLLARS!!!" honk honk "The clown makes a good argument." "Aye!"

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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"Steve, ask everyone in the department to sign this birthday card for my secretary." "I've led men in combat and this is the sort of assignment you give me???" "Also, run down to the convenience store and buy her something fluffy or orange."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

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Have you signed Ted's get well card yet? "Don't leave that here. Ted passed away two weeks ago. How long have you had the card on your desk?" "Have you signed Ted's get well card yet?" "Put it on the pile."

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #air bubbles, #buffer overflow, #ignorance (knowledge), #interview question, #interviews

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Interview question Boss: How would you diagnose a buffer overflow problem? Interviewee: I'd put the circuit board in a bucket of water and look for air bubbles. Boss: That sounds right. Interviewee: I just diagnosed a problem with your interview question.

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 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #meeting, #customers, #trust, #board, #write, #lie, #raise hand, #business

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The Boss says, "How can we rebuild the trust of our customers? Let's brainstorm." Dilbert says, "We could stop using misleading benchmark tests to sell shoddy products that have hidden costs." The Boss says, "I heard someone say 'lie.' Let's write that one down."