Managers Comic Strips - Page 13
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Character
596 Results for Managers
View 121 - 130 results for managers comic strips. Discover the best "Managers " comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday April 11,
2013
Tags ignorance (knowledge), managers & supervisors, work ethic, wifi enabled, bus, commute from san fransico, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Google provides a wi-fi enabled bus for its employees to commute from San Francisco. Why can't we be more like that? Boss: You want to be more like a bus? Dilbert: I found the problem.
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marketing, project, cloud, catbert, leadership, budget, birthday, engineer, time sheet, sales, wally, strategy, dogbert, powerpoint, project management, topper, leader, boss, change, meeting, data, management, mordac
Friday April 19,
2013
Tags competition (psychology), managers & supervisors, thwarting rivals, competitions, expensive engineering solutions, business
Transcript
Dilbert: Have you heard any rumors about what is driving our boss's decisions lately? Alice: He's thwarting a rival within the company by offering only prohibitively expensive engineering solutions. Dilbert: My work has meaning, but it's not the good kind.
Thursday February 21,
2008
Tags explanation for working, malicious, prove stupid, unemployment benefits, working
Transcript
Catbert: Wally, I have to fire you for posting a comic comparing managers to drunken lemurs. You won't be eligible for unemployment benefits unless you can prove you were stupid as opposed to malicious. Can you prove you're stupid? Wally: Is thereanother explanation for working here?"
Thursday July 01,
2010
Tags meeting, project, coordinate, give up, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Make sure you coordinate with the brand manager and the category manager." The Boss says, "And also the clients, the account execs, the project leaders, strategic planning, facilities management, product managers, marketing, and I.T." Dilbert says, "All I heard was 'give up.'" The Boss says, "Let's meet again in a year."
Tuesday June 09,
2009
Tags meeting, explaining, angry, confronting, annoyed, business
Transcript
The boss says, "Last week I attended the circle of excellence conference for managers." Alice says, "So, while we were doing actual work, you sat in a circle with a bunch of managers?" The boss says, "It wasn't like that." Alice says, "Oh, I think it was."
Saturday September 26,
2009
Tags manager, meeting, laughing, confused, angry, ridicule, criticism, embarrassed, business
Transcript
Man says, "Moving forward, we'll go after the low-hanging fruit at the end of the day." Dilbert says, "Ha ha!" Dilbert says, "I like the way you used humor to mock the vacuous way managers speak." Wally says, "Snork" Man says, "Which part was humor?" Dilbert says, "I'll just be quiet now."
Sunday February 13,
2011
Tags honesty, less meetings, less micromangemt, managers & supervisors, meetings, more meetings, more with less, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "We have to learn to do more with less." Dilbert says, "Less meetings?" The Boss says, "No. We'll need more meetings to figure out how to do more with less." Alice says, "Less micro-management?" The Boss says, "No, I'll have to watch you more closely than ever to make sure you're doing mroe with less." The Boss says, "I'm talking about using less money." Alice says, "Oh, like a death spiral. Why didn't you just say that in the first place?" Alice says, "It's as if you're talking more to say less." Dilbert says, "Should we be more like you or less?"
Sunday February 27,
2011
Tags managers & supervisors, new server, corrupt operating system, bad server, recover data, reinstall, redeploy it, blindingly obvious, alternative is chaos, chaos as good, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Build a new server to replace the one with the corrupt operating system." Dilbert says, "That's what I'm doing right now." The Boss says, "Recover the data from the bad server and put it on the new one." Dilbert says, "That's the whole point." The Boss says, "Then see if you can reinstall the operating system on the old one and redeploy it." Dilbert says, "Do you have any instructions that are not blindingly obvious?" The Boss says, "This is called managing. The alternative is chaos." Dilbert says, "How did you just make chaos sound like a good thing?" The Boss says, "You should test the new server." Dilbert says, "Seriously, can we try the chaos thing?"
Tuesday March 01,
2011
Tags business ethics, environmental issues, managers & supervisors, government nagging, rid of waste, motivational paper weight, nice going, avoid licking, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "The government is nagging us to get rid of our dangerous radioactive waste." The Boss says, "On a totally different topic, I'm giving each of you a motivational paperweight that says, 'Nice going.'" The Boss says, "Try to avoid licking them."
Thursday March 03,
2011
Tags managers & supervisors, mobile (cell) phones, app, awesome, don't fire me, business
Transcript
The Boss says, "Ted, there's an app for you." Cellphone says, "Waa-waa! Don't fire me!" The Boss says, "How awesome is that?"


