Disturbing News Comic Strips - Page 13

You can also use "quotes" and & to narrow down results.

181 Results for Disturbing News

View 121 - 130 results for disturbing news comic strips. Discover the best "Disturbing News" comics from Dilbert.com.

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #agreement, #bad news, #euphoric feeling, #harsh landing, #illusion of progress, #lasts a minute, #momentary sweetness, #reacts, #spoiler, #planning meeting

View Transcript

Transcript

Alice: Okay, we have a good plan forward. This meeting is adjourned. Oooh!!!" "AaaaH!!!" Asok: What is that?"AAAH!! Dilbert: She's tasting the sweet nectar of the illusion in progress. It's that euphoric feeling you get between the time you make a plan and the time some moron thwarts it. AAAH!!! It can last anywhere from less than a minute to as much as a minute. Wally: Ted won't meet with us because someone told him that you told someone else he was an obstacle. Alice: GRRRRR!!! Dilbert: The landing is harsh."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #company news letter, #compile beta test, #in memorium, #newsletter

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss: Wally, are you busy? Wally: Yes, I'm reading the 'In Memoriam' section of our company newsletter." The Boss: When you're done, can you compile the beta test results?" Wally: Sure. Just as soon as I get the data from... Larry."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #therapy, #addiction, #job posting, #dung beetlke, #epileptic cow, #disturbing imagery, #couch, #shrink, #current job, #unsatifying, #psychology

View Transcript

Transcript

A woman says, "How long have you been addicted to ogling online job postings?" Alice says, "It started when I realized my current job is like a dung beetle trying to mate with an epileptic cow." The woman says, "That imagery is disturbing." Alice says, "I know, right?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #job interview, #bed news, #upset, #hire someone, #hates boss, #set up, #cruel

View Transcript

Transcript

Job Interview The Boss says, "Would you tell me bad news even if you knew it would upset me?" A man says, "Yes, I would." The Boss says, "Why would I hire someone who hates me?"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #elbonia, #inflation rate, #billion percent, #potato, #philmsk, #bardley

View Transcript

Transcript

The news says, "The inflation rate in Elbonia climbed to a billion percent." An Elbonian says, "Quickly hand me the potato and I'll tell my cousin in Phlimsk to let go of the other end of my money." Another Elbonian says, "Make it snappy." The first Elbonian says, "Bradley! I have the potato!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #complaining, #yelling, #angry, #future

View Transcript

Transcript

Asok the intern says, "Your generation is leaving my generation a dying planet and a crippling debt." Wally says, "Hee Hee!" Asok the intern says, "But we shall invent life-extending drugs so you will suffer along with us! Ha!" News Wally says, "Uh-oh." Asok the intern says, "We will connect you to machines and keep you alive until the poor demand to eat you." Wally says, "Well played."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #work, #project, #change, #angry, #frustrated, #stupidity

View Transcript

Transcript

The Boss says, "I made some improvements to your drawings and sent them for fabrication." Dilbert says, "Gaaa!!!" The boss says, "But don't worry - I left your name on them so you'll get all of the credit." Dilbert says, "Waaaa!!!" The boss says, "You don't handle good news very well." Dilbert says, "Shoot me! Shoot me! Shoot me!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #newspaper, #scared, #praying, #stock broker, #sitting, #computer, #reading, #smiling, #technology, #Entertainment

View Transcript

Transcript

Carol says, "Your stockbroker is in the news today." The boss says, "Uh-oh." The boss says, "Please be because he won a humanitarian award?or he was killed by a celebrity." Carol says, "Ironically, several celebrity humanitarians do want to kill him now." The boss says, "Gaaaa!!!"

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #raise, #bribery, #agreement, #money, #clothes, #confused, #crime

View Transcript

Transcript

Catbert: Evil director of human resources Wally says, "According to the news, everyone in power is corrupt." Catbert says, "So?" Wally says, "If you give me a 20% raise, I'll kick back half to you." Catbert says, "Done." Dilbert says, "How did you afford a new vest in this economy? Crime?" Wally says, "I'm dabbling."

Thank you for voting.
Hmm. Something went wrong. We will take a look as soon as we can.
 - Dilbert by Scott Adams

Tags #drinking, #coffee, #crime, #talking, #shivering, #disturbing

View Transcript

Transcript

Wally dabbles in crime Wally says, "A lot of people think crime is a bad thing." Wally says, "But it all depends on how you pick your role models." Wally says, "I lean toward governors, bankers, athletes and sith lords." Dilbert says, "I feel a coldness."