Fat And Lazy Comic Strips - Page 13
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137 Results for Fat And Lazy
View 121 - 130 results for fat and lazy comic strips. Discover the best "Fat And Lazy" comics from Dilbert.com.
Thursday November 17,
2016
Followship Training
Tags #leadership, #following, #lazy, #work ethic, #motivation
Transcript
Boss: I'm too busy to take a leaders hip class, so I'm sending all of you to a followship class. Dilbert: Is that so we can learn how to follow someone who never learned to lead? Boss: That sounds like a good question for your followship teacher.
Sunday December 04,
2016
Tags #scam, #language, #accent, #communication
Transcript
Dogbert: I'm starting a foreign accent schools for the lazy. People assume you're smarter when you know more than one language. But learning a new language takes too much work. So I'll teach you how to speak your own language with a foreign accent. People will assume you are bilingual at the very least. And when you use bad grammar with a foreign accent it makes you look adorable. You'll never need to do another courtesy laugh, either. People will just assume you didn't get the joke. Dilbert: This is one of your better ideas. Dogbert: You should hear it with an accent!
Tuesday March 28,
2017
Wanting More Out Of Life
Wednesday March 29,
2017
Wally Is Either Lazy Or Wise
Tags #laziness, #genius, #work ethic, #efficiency
Transcript
Woman: Can you do that by end of day? Wally: It would be smarter to wait until we have the final specs. Woman: I can't tell if you're lazy or wise. Wally: It's all the same thing. Woman: This is a weird gray area. Wally: I'm going to take a quick nap to boost my productivity.
Saturday November 25,
2017
Threatening Wally
Tags #laziness, #excuse, #threat, #ultimatum
Transcript
Woman: Wally, did you finish the data scrub? Wally: No, a defect in my brain made me too lazy. Woman: Perhaps some sort of threat would get you going. Wally: It's worth a try. Woman: Do your work or else I'll tell everyone you're useless! Wally: That would save me a lot of time.
Monday February 26,
2018
Dogbert's Personality Profiles
Tags #consultant, #personality, #test, #business, #psychology
Transcript
Dogbert: I have the results of your Dogbert Personality Profiles. Based on your questionnaire answers, Alice is angry, Wally is lazy, and Dilbert is boring. Dilbert: How are we supposed to use this new information? Dogbert: Wake me up when he's done talking.
Sunday August 12,
2018
Tags #the boss, #Dogbert, #unhealthy, #exercise, #mouse
Transcript
Dogbert: All of your employees are fat and unhealthy. That's why you should replace your outdated cubicles with treadmill desks. My company makes a treadmill desk that requires no electricity. The Boss: What if the employees don't like it? Dogbert: They already hate everything about their jobs there's no real downside. The Boss: Good point. Dogbert: I know. I'll send you one of our demo units so you can test it out. The boss: I finally feel as if I'm getting somewhere.
Friday September 14,
2018
Virtual Reality
Tags #Dilbert, #Wally, #days, #virtual, #trained, #hospital, #designer, #bed, #lazy
Transcript
Dilbert: After spending three great days in virtual reality, I accidentally trained myself to hate actual reality. Wally: What if this reality is actually another virtual reality, and you're really in a hospital bed somewhere? Dilbert: What kind of designer would make a reality with you in it? Wally: A lazy one.
Wednesday October 10,
2018
Dogbert The Insultant
Tags #Dogbert, #business, #insultant, #journal, #week, #fat, #stupid, #question, #list
Transcript
Dogbert the business insultant. Dogbert: Make a journal of everything you do for a week. Then stop doing everything that is on your list because it's making you fat and stupid. The Boss: I have some questions. Dogbert: Add "asks questions" to your list.
Monday October 15,
2018
Everyone Else Is Worthless
Tags #Dilbert, #fire, #pawn, #problems, #project, #the boss, #useless, #work
Transcript
The Boss: I'm adding you to the network upgrade project. Everyone else on the team is lazy and useless, so I need you to do all of their work. Dilbert: Maybe you should fire them. The Boss: Don't try to pawn off your problems on me.