Robot Building Skills Comic Strips - Page 13
372 Results for Robot Building Skills
View 121 - 130 results for robot building skills comic strips. Discover the best "Robot Building Skills" comics from Dilbert.com.
Share October 06, 2002's comic on:
Wally is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches and says, "Wally, it's time for your annual performance review." As they're walking to the conference room, The Boss says to Wally, "None of my usual words fit your situation." They enter the conference room and take seats. The Boss continues, "So I had to hit the thesaurus pretty hard." The Boss continues, "Your overall rating is 'feral.'" The Boss continues, "Your leadership skills are rated 'squirrely.'" The Boss continues, "And your teamwork is a solid 'coot.'" The Boss continues, "Your long-term potential is to die in the landscaping and become compost." After the meeting, Dilbert asks Wally, "How'd it go?" Wally responds, "I wasn't really listening."
Share January 04, 2003's comic on:
Investigative Reporter. A reporter and cameraman follow The Boss out of the building. The reporter says, "Explain why your company dumps garbage in the park." The Boss climbs into his giant car. The reporter continues, "And why do you drive such a huge, wasteful vehicle?" The Boss approaches Asok and says, "I need you to scrape something off my tires and take it to the park."
Share January 21, 2003's comic on:
Dilbert is sitting at his computer. The Boss approaches and says, "I'm putting you in charge of building our new technology lab." The Boss continues, "Pick the contractor with the lowest bid. I don't see any problems with that strategy." Dilbert is meeting with a beaver. Dilbert says, "So, your bid says you'll do the job for... 'A chance to gnaw on wood.'" The beaver responds, "Too high?"
Share January 29, 2003's comic on:
Dilbert fastens the head atop a robot of himself. He says to Dilbert, "I call my invention the 'Visibuddy.'" Dilbert continues, "It's a mindless replica that can attend meeting and increase my visibility." The Visibuddy, The Boss, and Dilbert are in a meeting. The Visibuddy asks The Boss, "Am I working hard or hardly working? Do you golf?" The Boss thinks, "Nice guy."
Share April 25, 2003's comic on:
The speaker greets Wally, "Wally, congratulations on finishing the coffee rehab program." A cab is waiting for Wally. The speaker says, "Our recidivism rate isn't too hot. Our critics blame our location." Wally's cab is parked in front of Starbucks World Headquarters. A voice from inside the building asks, "Who's swimming in our vat?"
Share May 08, 2003's comic on:
Headline: P.R. for Elbonia. Dogbert is meeting with two Elbonians. Dogbert says, "You need to buy influence in Washington." Dogbert continues, "It sounds expensive, but it's a lot more affordable than you'd think." An Elbonian stands outside of a building in Washington D.C. He stops a politician and asks, "Gum?" The politician responds, "You got my vote!"
Share June 13, 2003's comic on:
Alice is walking outside, she approaches The Garbageman and asks, "Would it be wrong to marry a man for his homemaking skills?" The Garbageman replies, "Do a present-value cash-flow comparison of marriage versus the equivalent service from trained monkeys." Bobby is sobbing. Alice consoles him, "It's not you.. it's me... and a world wide oversupply of monkeys."
Share August 05, 2003's comic on:
"I'm trying to make him lose his language skills." "I've been using words in the wrong context and waiting for him to adopt them." "Carol, could you truculent this doctrinaire to the obelisk?" "Cervically."
Share September 27, 2003's comic on:
Man; "I was an engineer before I got into marketing, so I have a few suggestions for your network design." man: "Get rid of this 'Cisco' doohickey, whatever it is, and put it in a catapult made from local trees." Dilbert: "Has it been awhile?" Man: "At least I have good social skills now, you dipweed.
Share November 14, 2003's comic on:
Tina: "Wally, can you show me how to make changes to the skills database?" Wally: "I can't risk being known as the guy who knows how to edit the database." Tina: "Because?" Wally: "I barely have time to avoid the work I already have."